The Erotic Mind-Control Story Archive

Chapter 1: Evan meets Benjamin

One look, and Evan was hooked. There were a lot of cute freshmen around, but he kept his eye on the blond boy wandering uncertainly through the Student Union. Evan smiled as he considered just watching the 5′10″ hottie further, rather than helping him, as he was supposed to do. Evan had volunteered to help out the new arrivals that Saturday. He walked over to introduce himself.

Evan knew he was in trouble as he started to speak. This kid was devastatingly handsome. He had a mop of sun-bleached blond hair and a tan to match. Sizing up his tight, slim build, Evan guessed he was a swimmer. Evan would have to make some real effort keeping his feelings in check, or he’d quickly lose control. He knew from experience how ugly that could be.

“Hey there. You look like you’re trying to find something,” Evan said.

“Eh, yeah,” replied the unnamed beauty, looking up from a paper in his hand. “I have to find the, uh, Lorillard Room. That’s where I sign up for a dorm.”

Evan saw he had a pleasing pair of hazel-green eyes to go with a fresh face and chiseled features. If he wanted it, the kid could likely get work as a Hollister model. Yet there was a wide-eyed, boyish innocence that really got to Evan.

Evan smiled back at him. “I figured. My name’s Evan. I’m a volunteer helping out today,” he said, holding out his hand to the cute freshman.

The newbie took Evan’s hand. “Uh, hi. I’m Ben—um, Benjamin Pritchard,” he said. Evan’s surprisingly strong grip caused Benjamin to really look at him. He couldn’t fail to notice Evan’s strapping shoulders, impressive guns, and tapered torso. When he looked up a good four inches, the smaller freshman saw a pair of clear, deep blue eyes, smiling back at him kindly. Or was that a hint of something else? Benjamin wondered. “Nice to meet you,” he said.

Evan brushed back an errant lock of his wavy dark hair from his eyes. He needed a haircut; but he kind of liked a wilder look.

“Lorillard’s right behind you,” Evan said, pointing over Benjamin’s shoulder. “I’m sure you would’ve found it in a few seconds on your own. I’m headed there anyways, so I’ll go with you.” He turned and Benjamin followed as he made his way across the hall through a scrum of wandering students.

“So, where are you from, Ben?” Evan asked.

“Someplace you never heard of: Rio Rosa, California—north-central valley. Maybe 3,000 people there,” Benjamin said.

“You’re right! Never heard of it. What do they do there?”

“Mainly grow stuff—lots of tomatoes. It’s home, but...”

“I hear you. Tomatoes are fine—but not 24/7.”

Benjamin laughed. “Right.”

“Parents paying for school?” Evan asked.

“I wish! It’d be cool to be one of those guys.” the freshman exclaimed. “Nah, I got a swimming scholarship. I’m majoring in business. You?”

Evan shrugged and air-quoted as he said, “I’m one of ‘those guys’. My parents are paying for my MBA.”

“That’s cool—hey, that means we’re in the same program, right? Not that I’m getting a masters. But I’d love to have parents that could put me through school. My family does OK,” Benjamin added, a little defensively—“but my parents are farmers. They think I need to do this on my own.

“You play any sports?” Benjamin asked.

“I played football in high school, but haven’t done anything since I got to Hampshire College. Been kind of lazy, truth be told. Although I still love to watch it. Football, I mean.” Evan said.

“Seriously?” Benjamin said, grimacing in disbelief as he gave Evan a quick once-over. “You look like you know your way around a gym, dude.”

Evan threw up his arm and flexed one of his powerful biceps. “You got me. I do work out. A lot.”

Benjamin smiled, but then his face fell as they got to the room with the dorm sign-up. The line went on forever, and he knew he was going to have to meet up with a bunch of other people he didn’t know.

“Say, this is kind of bold of me, but...” Evan said. “If you want to go through the room lottery, that’s your choice; but you don’t have to. If an upperclassman agrees, you can team up with him, and avoid all that.”

The blond-headed newcomer shrugged, hesitating, “I guess…what’s the downside of the lottery? You end up with other freshmen, right?”

“Not necessarily; probably, yes; but you could get a sophomore or even an upperclassman. The main thing is, it’s a mystery; you might get a bro—or Mr. Scary.”

“Excellent point. But how do I link up with an upperclassman?”

“Well, you dope, you already have. Me!”

“Oh!” Benjamin laughed as he slapped his head. “So, you’re offering?”

“Yeah, buddy; I had a roommate first year, but last year I wanted to live alone. Costs more, but my family can afford it,” Evan shrugged. “Still, it’s nice to have a roommate. Anyway, I figured, we’ve been talking, you seem like a safe and normal guy…”

“Ha! You’ll be surprised!”

Evan laughed. “Maybe we both will! So what do you say?”

Benjamin hesitated, looked into the hall at the long lines at the tables, with frustrated students filling out forms and shuffling from place to place…

“Sounds great, man! Thanks!”

Evan smiled as he clapped his new roommate on the shoulder; “OK, we go over here to set this up. Then we’ll get your gear into the room.”

A couple of hours later, they were stretched out on a couch and an easy chair. From the heat of the work, they’d both stripped their shirts off. Benjamin was already wearing some khaki shorts, while Evan had changed into some running shorts. Evan popped a couple of beers and they were watching a college football game.

“This is a boss set of rooms, Evan—is this what everybody gets?”

“No way,” laughed Evan. “I had to use a few connections.” They each had a room, plus a common room, plus a shared bathroom. That wasn’t what was so different, however. Evan’s suite was notably larger; it was on a corner, giving it extra windows; and best of all, while suites normally housed four students, Evan and Benjamin had this to themselves.

Benjamin looked around. It didn’t hurt that Evan had some sweet stuff: expensive furniture, a kick-ass sound system, a well stocked fridge and bar. The freshman hadn’t brought much stuff with him; he didn’t have a car and he was a long way from California. And he had expected to share a small room anyway.

Shaking his head, Benjamin said “Damn, I hit the jackpot man!”

Evan laughed. “Another beer?” he asked.

“Sure! You?” Benjamin jumped up. “I’ll grab it! Least I can do, big man,” he said. He grabbed two more Sierra Nevadas from the fridge. “Even if I were legal, I’d never be able to afford this stuff,” he said, handing Evan a bottle.

“Only the best for me, kid!”

After the second beer, they both realized how hungry they were. “You want to go anywhere, Benj? My treat.”

When Benjamin came to college, he was hoping to leave behind “Ben,” his nickname growing up; but feeling awkward correcting Evan, he’d let it pass earlier. With Evan being such a great guy, he let it pass again. He hoped he could figure out a nice way to explain his feelings about it later.

“Aw, thanks man, you don’t have to do that. I’ve got a meal plan, I can use that.” Benjamin said.

“Screw that; you’ll get tired of that soon enough. You like Chinese? You get any Chinese food in Rio Crappo, or wherever the hell you’re from?”

“Have I had Chinese?” Benjamin said, laughing. “Yeah)…I’ve had Chinese…”

“OK, so it’s Chinese.” Evan pulled out his cell, dialed it, and started in ordering: double order of spring rolls, Hanoi Beef, General Tso’s Chicken, extra spicy, Pork Lo Mein. After ending the call, he said, “they’ll be here in ten minutes. Great place, right next to campus. It helps that I tip well.”

Benjamin had a look of mock-offense on his face. “Hey thanks for asking me what I want.”

“What do you know? Farm boy. Nothing. Let the grownups decide.”

“Well, I’m pretty sure Hanoi Beef is Vietnamese, not Chinese.”

“Oh, so now you’re Anthony Bourdain? Well, genius, it happens to be a Chinese place, run by a Vietnamese couple. This is the metropolis of Columbus, Ohio where we have sophisticated things like that, not Sheep-fuck, California. But I figured someone who was raised by cows might be confused about that, so I left out that part.”

That set Benjamin off laughing hard again. They went around like this till there was a knock on the door. Evan reached in his pocket, and pulled out two twenties. “He said it’d be $30—let him keep the change.” Benjamin decided not to argue about Evan paying, and took the money and answered the door.

Evan kept his perch, stretched out on the couch, watching Alabama pound Colorado State. “Where do you want all this?”

“There’re some forks and spoons in a drawer there—grab some and that roll of paper towels, and bring it all over here.”

Benjamin did that, and noticing the beer situation, grabbed two more. As they passed back and forth the cartons of food, and threw back a few more beers, the roommates had a good time talking about sports, school, girls and a lot else.

An hour or so later, as the game wound down, Evan finally rolled off the couch. “Hmm, that was good! I think I’m going to go over to the center and do a little lifting.” Gesturing toward the mess they’d made, he added, “you don’t mind taking care of this, do you?” He didn’t wait for an answer; he went into his room and put on a clean shirt.

Coming back out, he found his roommate already gathering up the trash. “Good boy!” he said. “And I think you mentioned you have a test tomorrow, right? So when I come back, you’ll be studying, right?”

Benjamin smiled and mock-saluted. “Yes, Sir!”

Evan chuckled as he slapped Benjamin on the shoulder on the way out. “That’s my boy!”

Chapter 2: Benjamin finds his place

Starting out at college was a challenge for Benjamin: new people, new classes, and a new home. It didn’t take long before he was really glad he’d accepted Evan’s offer. The upperclassman always seemed to have a handle on things. And he was pretty generous with his time, showing Benjamin around campus, and around the student center, including the gym. They put in a fair amount of time in the gym.

No matter how busy things got, after classes, and after the gym, a couple of evenings a week at least, Benjamin always managed to connect with Evan. They’d either get a meal out together or get some food and hang out in their room.

The second Friday of the semester, Evan texted Benjamin in class. “Friends heading to Edgar’s. Meet me there at 5.” Benjamin had planned to hit the library, but he didn’t need much persuading to skip it. He liked Evan; he figured he’d like Evan’s friends. Besides, it hadn’t taken many meals at the Center for Benjamin to see how right Evan had been. But it also didn’t take long for Benjamin to feel bad about Evan always paying. While they were taking their seats in their booth that night, Benjamin leaned in to say something about that very subject in Evan’s ear. Evan responded, “we’ll talk about it later.”

Just then, five new faces arrived. Evan introduced them each to Benjamin. “Ben, this is Jason and Carrie, Beck, Andrew and Zak.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Benjamin.”

Jason was a junior, an engineering student. He was stocky, with reddish brown hair cut very short. He had some impressive muscular definition. Benjamin guessed him a wrestler from his build—especially around the shoulders and neck, and the way his golf shirt and jeans seemed painted on—and he turned out to be right. Since Benjamin had done some wrestling in high school before focusing on swimming, that gave the two of them something to talk about.

Carrie, a freshman, had come with Jason. Apparently, they’d also met at freshman orientation. Carrie was an English major. She was whip-smart and gorgeous, with long, strawberry-blonde hair. She also had a juicy set of lips that Benjamin had a hard time keeping his eyes off of—except when he was stealing glances at her rack. While looking at Carrie, he noticed she had a kind of twisted rope choker around her neck. He might not have noticed it, except she kept bringing her hand to it. Jason caught Benjamin admiring Carrie’s looks a couple of times and just grinned.

Beck was tall and strong. He didn’t have an ounce of fat on him, but also didn’t have a lot of definition. He had wavy red hair and a pale complexion. He was pre-law senior, and he didn’t seem to talk much.

Then there was Andrew and Zak. Andrew was a pre-med senior; Zak was a sophomore in sports management. Andrew was trim, and fairly cut. Benjamin figured out from the conversation that he was a serious biker. Andrew was African-American. He kept his hair natural and fairly short, and his clothing was sharp—and expensive. He looked like he walked out of an Abercrombie catalogue. Zak was into lacrosse, and it turned out, was another business student. He was also a sophomore. He had dirty blond hair, very curly and a little bushy. Were they a couple, or just friends? Benjamin couldn’t figure it out.

Evan ordered two pitchers of beer and another of ice water—then poured out beer for everyone, with a wink to Benjamin. When everyone had a beer, he slapped Benjamin on the back and said: “Well, here he is, folks: the California farm boy!” Everyone laughed, and naturally, had questions for Benjamin about his farm, his family, and what his small town was like. Although Carrie and Zak were also from small towns, it turned out Rio Rosa was the smallest. Zak wanted to know if Benjamin lived near the beach, and if he surfed a lot. He was a little disappointed to find out Benjamin didn’t make that many trips to the ocean. His tan, Benjamin explained, came from summer lifeguard duty.

As they talked, Benjamin noticed not only was Carrie smart, she seemed to have an outgoing personality too—yet she seemed pretty deferential to Jason. Similarly, when Zak asked Benjamin a couple of questions, it seemed like Andrew jumped in and took over. Later on, he noticed something curious—a rope choker around Zak’s neck that looked the same as Carrie’s. Benjamin couldn’t help but notice that Zak fingered his necklace fairly often as well, the same as way Carrie did.

After awhile, they ordered some pizza, and went through several more pitchers. The waiter didn’t seem too interested in who was drinking beer or water, so Benjamin didn’t stress about it.

Although Benjamin was thrilled to meet some new folks—and he liked everyone at the table—he was glad when the spotlight shifted to someone else. He was glad to hear about sports from the other guys, and he learned some things about lacrosse, which he didn’t know much about. As he listened, Benjamin also learned a few things about Evan—his star performance as QB for his high school football team, and his summer travels with his family. Benjamin figured out that Evan had gone to Europe, where his family came from—but never managed to figure out what country Evan actually came from. Have to ask him about that later, Benjamin thought to himself.

The only negative was that several times, Evan called him “Ben” and even “Benj”. A couple of the others picked up on it, calling him Ben. And even though he didn’t like it—no one had ever called him “Benj” before—he decided to let it go.

The evening flew by. When the conversation lulled a little, Evan puts his hands up. “Well, guys, it’s getting kind of late; not for me, but for my boy here, who has to get up and hit the pool pretty early tomorrow.” He looked at Benjamin: “Right?”

“Aye, aye, Captain.” It was true. Benjamin had swim practice three days a week at six am—and that was before the season began. When Evan stood up, Benjamin did the same. As Benjamin stepped out of the booth, Evan pulled out his wallet and threw some bills on the table. He looked at Andrew and Beck, and asked, “That should do it?”—meaning for Benjamin and him. Neither Carrie or Zak put any money in. They didn’t even make a move to do so. Beck nodded, “sure man. Later.”

On the way back to the dorm, Benjamin looked up at his taller roommate, and brought up the fact that Evan was always paying Benjamin’s way.

Evan flashed a smile at Benjamin, putting his beefy arm around his shoulders. “Don’t worry about it, Benji; look, my parents are rich, and they send me more than I need. What am I supposed to do, send it back? Then they’d cut it back, and where would I be then? Look—don’t think of it as my money; think of it as free money.” Benjamin went along with it; but he figured, the least he could do was do some favors for Evan in return. So he didn’t mind picking things up. A couple of weeks in, it had become a habit for both of them.

As plush as Evan’s quarters were, it wasn’t all a party. There was work to be done. For Benjamin, it was a grind. He’d done pretty well in high school, but this was harder. It helped a lot that Evan and he were both in business school. With Evan’s help, he was keeping up, and getting more Bs and an occasional A.

Three weeks into the semester, Benjamin was starting to feel at ease. He was more homesick than he wanted to admit, especially missing his friends from high school. He’d been really glad to chat with a lot of them via Facebook, especially his best friend, Trevor, who he’d known since sixth grade.

They’d hung out together, played sports together, made the wrestling team together, studied together; they’d even gone on double dates together. Now Trevor was at school in Arizona, in his first year studying psychology. But they talked together frequently, either by phone, email, or via Facebook. During one those sessions, when Benjamin said he missed Trevor one too many times, his buddy started kidding him about it.

“Jeez, buddy, I never realized you felt that way about me! I mean, it’s flattering and all, but my sister’ll be broken hearted.”

Benjamin burst out laughing. He could picture his friend flashing a bright smile at him with a sarcastic look; he fired right back: “What’re you talking about? You’re the one who fixed me up with her!”

“Yeah, because you were so sad and lonely. I felt sorry for you. Someone had to step in. Besides, you should consider it a privilege to go out with my sister. I just never knew it was really me you were pining for.”

“Oh shut up!”

“You can’t talk to me that way. You’re the sidekick. Does Robin backtalk Batman? I don’t think so.” A moment later, Trevor forwarded a cartoon showing Batman slapping Robin that was always being circulated on the Net with some funny caption or another.

They kept messaging for awhile, Trevor asking about classes and how things were going with the new roommate. That got Benjamin going about the difference Evan was making in his studying, how he was getting to know new friends, how great it was to hang out with Evan, how they worked out together, how much weight Evan could bench, and so on.

“You’re gonna make me puke. ‘He’s my dream man!’”

“Dude you’re gonna make me piss my pants!”

“No, but it sounds like Evan will, you love him so much.”

“You’re so full of shit—no wonder your eyes are brown.”

“Well, if I can’t be there to whip your butt in shape, sounds like Evan’s getting it done. And boy do you need it, son!”

Benjamin loved it—it was just like always. He’d have kept going, too, but Trevor called a halt. “Didn’t you say you had some studying to do? Then snap to it. Chop-chop.”

The next day, when his E-con prof paired off students for a research project, Benjamin was especially happy to be put together with Allison, a sexy, long-legged brunette who usually sat behind him. On the pretext of planning their project, Benjamin suggested to her that they meet later for pizza. He was a little bummed when she suggested bringing another group along, but when he saw it included Stephanie—the blond he’d been stealing glances at since the first day—he didn’t mind including her partner, Chad.

When he stopped back to the room that afternoon, he found Evan at his desk. “Hey man, just realized, I haven’t seen you all day. How’s it going?”

Evan shrugged. “It’s going. You?”

Benjamin told Evan about his plans. “Sounds great, kid. Two girls, eh? Poor Chad.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, dude, I assume you’re going to squeeze him out, right? Keep ’em to yourself?”

Benjamin laughed. “I…don’t think so. Chad’s bigger ’n I am. Looks like a football player. And, best of all, he’s the most likely not to get carded!”

“Then it sounds like you need that man after all.”

“It doesn’t hurt that he seems to get this stuff. Allison too, for that matter. She’s the best in the class—it just clicks for her.”

“A lot of economics is intuitive; sometimes it just clicks.”

“C’mon, Evan—all this stuff clicks for you.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Quit kidding around. You’re getting all As, aren’t you?”

“Well…yeah.”

“And, this is the first time I’ve seen you at your desk since Saturday. I don’t know how you do it, man; you’re just better!”

Evan swiveled around on his chair, toward Benjamin, and gave an exaggerated shrug. “What? Can I help it if I’m a god among men?” That made Benjamin laugh; even more when Evan held out his hand with a haughty gesture. Not to be outdone, Benjamin, laughing, fell to his knees, bowing down, while repeating, “I’m not worthy! I’m not worthy!”

Evan could barely stop laughing long enough to say, “Very good, very good. You may rise”—provoking more guffaws from them both, as Benjamin did get up. As Evan’s laughter subsided, he realized the sight of Benjamin, down at his feet, provoked another reaction—fast and hard. As his face flushed from the sudden wave of arousal, Evan shifted around in his chair to try to conceal the reaction. For Evan, an erection was hard to conceal. Dammit! Ben was turning that way. Just then, Benjamin—still laughing, turned toward the fridge. “You want something? All of a sudden, I‘m thirsty.”

“Yeah, you’ve been working hard: acting like an idiot!”

By the time Benjamin came back with a couple of Cokes, still chuckling, Evan’s blood had cooled.

Taking the Coke from Benjamin, Evan said, “Seriously, what you’re not seeing is how hard I worked the last two years. Last year, especially. That’s one reason I didn’t have a roommate. I was able to focus better.” Benjamin nodded, mentally filling in the rest: being damn smart helps too. But he appreciated the fact that, for someone who seemed to have it all, Evan was a really nice guy.

They quit joking around long enough for Evan to ask Benjamin a few more questions about the assignment, and give him some pointers. After that, Benjamin went into his room to change—even if it wasn’t officially a date, he wanted to look sharp. When he came back out, Evan got up from the desk and met him at the door. “Here,” he said, looking down at Benjamin, holding out two twenties.

“Aw, thanks man, but I can’t take that. I’ve got enough.”

“Sure you can. I told you, don’t worry about it.”

Benjamin wanted to argue, but for some reason, he didn’t. Evan didn’t wait for Benjamin to take it. He just reached down and stuck it in Benjamin’s front pocket.

Three hours later Benjamin was home. Evan was typing on his laptop. “How’d it go, stud?”

Benjamin rubbed his mop of sun-bleached hair as he grinned kind of sheepishly. “OK, I guess. We had a good time.”

“Get any work done?”

“Actually, yeah—Chad did a good job keeping us on task, and we put some notes together and split up the assignment, just the way you suggested. They were pretty impressed with your advice, man.”

Evan raised his hands and shrugged, as if to say, “what did I tell you?” Benjamin laughed, then went into his room. He came back a few minutes later with his laundry basket and a bottle of detergent, very obviously headed to the washers.

“Say, you don’t mind throwing in some stuff for me, do you? It’s in the closet. There’s a bunch of quarters there in that jar. Benjamin shrugged and scooped up a bunch of quarters, which he put in his pocket. Then he went and got Evan’s basket, which was fuller than his. He nested Evan’s basket in his own and headed down the hall. He came back a few minutes later and fired up his own laptop to work on his econ assignment.

About a half hour later, with his laptop under his arm, Benjamin went back down to the laundry. “Hey, you want me to throw your stuff in the dryer?”

“Sure, that’d be great!”

After Benjamin loaded the dryers with Evan’s and his stuff, he found a nearby chair and went back to work on the laptop. After awhile, a slender girl with close-bobbed red hair came along to check on her laundry. Benjamin’s productivity crashed as he stole a few glances at the girl’s curves, nicely displayed by a tight t-shirt and cut-off sweat pants.

The dryers buzzed, telling Benjamin his clothes were dry. The girl was waiting for her clothes to finish drying—which meant she‘d be there awhile. Benjamin decided staying to fold his laundry there was a good idea. He tried to catch her eye, but she was pretty focused on her book. Finally, her dryer buzzed, and she brought her clean clothes to the table to fold them. Benjamin‘s spirits rose—only to realize he was almost finished folding his clothes. Looking for an excuse to hang around, he noticed Evan’s clothes. He shrugged and started folding them, too.

“Hi! What are you reading?”

“Oh—The Great Gatsby—for freshman English.”

“Really? Wow, I’m a freshman too! But I must have a different section, I haven’t seen you.”

Benjamin asked her about herself. She was a classics major, so her coursework didn’t overlap much with his major of business. After they had talked for awhile, Benjamin realized he’d never asked her name, or given his. “I’m Benj—I mean, Benjamin!”

“I’m Laura.”

They kept at it, but eventually they both get distracted finishing up their laundry. Finally, she looked up and smiled. “Nice meeting you.” She saw what he was holding in his hands—a jockstrap. She giggled. He blushed.

Chapter 3: Closing in

As October turned into November, some of the things the roommates learned they had in common were surprising. One morning, Benjamin came out of the shower, just in his boxers. His blond hair—darker now with only traces of summer left—was still wet and he had a towel around his shoulders.

Evan was up already, wearing some cut off sweats and a basketball-style jersey that hung loosely on him. He was at the table with a cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal, reading something on his laptop. It was Sunday, and neither of them had to be anywhere that morning, so Benjamin was enjoying taking it easy. Evan glanced over his laptop to watch Benjamin lean into the fridge for the milk, and then reach up to the top shelf for a cereal bowl.

All this time, Benjamin had never asked why the cereal bowls had to be so high in the cupboard, which suited Evan just fine. It meant never having to explain that the sole purpose was to allow Evan regular, furtive peeks at Benjamin’s toned body every morning.

As Benjamin reached for a bowl, Evan coolly watched, savoring the sight of Benjamin’s lean body stretching, straining, grasping for the bowl, just out of reach. Evan’s eyes traced the line of Benjamin’s legs up to the half-moon circle of his rear, then they settled on the incredibly sexy curve of Benjamin’s lower back. Evan feasted his eyes on the boy’s bottom, wishing only that it be even rounder. Benjamin was toned, but not cut—something often true of swimmers.

Evan was careful to lower his gaze just as Benjamin started for the table. Just before he did, he caught a quick glimpse of Benjamin’s crotch. As the slender, freshman came to the table, Evan could tell something nice was swinging there. As Benjamin sat down to Evan’s left, Evan looked up from his computer, gazing intently at Benjamin’s chest. Evan noted that it could use even more beefing up.

“What’re you looking at?” Benjamin asked.

Was Evan making a move on him? They’d been rooming together all semester; if Evan was interested in him, wouldn’t Benjamin have picked up on it already? Wouldn’t he have seen some kind of sign?

Benjamin looked straight at Evan’s strong face, wondering what was going on. His heart thumping in his chest as he waited for some response to Evan, who was still staring right at his chest.

“Evan, what’re you looking at?” Benjamin asked again, his heart still racing.

Evan reached over and flicked his finger just under one of Benjamin’s headlamps. Benjamin jumped. But then he saw Evan holding his hand in front of him, and realized what Evan was looking at: a blob of shaving cream, on the end of Evan’s finger.

“Oh!” he laughed. “That’s a relief—it was like you were making a move on me!” he said. “You know swimmers shave, right?”

“Sure—I shave my chest too.”

“Really? Huh, how’d I miss that?” Benjamin took a second look at Evan’s face—just a day without shaving and his face was pretty dark. Then he looked down at Evan’s chest—his loose, basketball-style jersey showed a lot of skin—and sure enough, what he could see of Evan’s chest was hairless.

“Yeah, well—I like how it looks.” Evan said.

“Me too. And, working the pool over the summer, it makes for a better tan.”

As they ate breakfast, the question came back to Benjamin—there wasn’t anything more to that interchange, was there? Benjamin looked over at Evan while they both ate. Evan was totally relaxed. He seemed utterly focused on the ESPN homepage. They’d been rooming together for awhile now, but would Benjamin have picked up on it if Evan was into guys?

It was a good thing Evan was so absorbed in what he was reading. Benjamin needed to turn this over in his head. He and Evan had kidded and horsed around, but something seemed a little off this time.

“Maybe it’s just that I’m as horny as shit,” Benjamin thought to himself.

As great a roommate as Evan was, just having a roommate was cutting into Benjamin’s privacy for—among other things—relieving pent up hormones.

Eating his cereal, Benjamin glanced over at Evan again, still surfing the Net. Thinking about how he’d missed the fact that Evan shaved his chest, he realized that he’d never really seen Evan other than fully dressed. Even though they worked out together, the only time he saw Evan shirtless was in the pool, which wasn’t that often. And even in the sauna, Evan would wear a t-shirt.

It was weird, since Evan certainly had nothing to hide: he had a massive chest. His shoulders and arms were definitely some of the best on campus, and Benjamin couldn’t see an ounce of fat on the man. And as self-confident as Evan was, Benjamin wouldn’t ever call him shy. Yet he’d never saw Evan showering, or even dressing.

Somehow, whenever they were going for a workout, things just worked out in such a way that Evan was already dressed by the time Evan was starting to get changed. Both before and after their workouts. Not that it mattered, but it was a little unusual. Just one of those things, I guess, Benjamin thought to himself.

At that point, his thoughts shifted back to the way dorm life was crowding his privacy.

Since he was the youngest of four boys, by the time Benjamin hit high school, his two oldest brothers, “Buck” and Chris, were both out of the house. The last three years, Alex, the next oldest, while still at home, wasn‘t around much. First, because he commuted to college a half-hour away. And second, over the past year, he’d been getting serious with a girl, and spending a lot of time with her. As a result, for Benjamin’s high school years, finding time to be alone and let off steam hadn’t been a problem.

But since moving in with Evan, even though he had his own bedroom, it just wasn‘t the same. And Benjamin was definitely feeling it—which was a mixed blessing, he had to admit. When he’d wrestled the first two years of high school, a lot of the guys, including his buddy Trevor, talked about how they would hold off so they didn’t “drain their energy.” But with a lot of unspent “energy,” no wonder he’d been jumpy when Evan pointed out the shaving cream on his chest.

His mind wandered to another frustration: the uneven wi-fi in the dorm. Maybe it was because their room was at the end of the hall. For whatever reason, while they got a reasonable signal in their common area, but not in their bedrooms—at least, not in Benjamin’s. Back home, his parents had been strict about no computer usage in his bedroom, and his dad had installed filtering software on the family computer.

His parents weren’t in lockstep with the conservative church they belonged to, but they did believe in what his dad called “a clean life.” His parents felt very strongly about waiting till marriage, and Benjamin thought it made sense: sex wasn’t supposed to be just recreation, it really helped bind two people together. And his father had repeatedly made the point that it’s precisely because it was hard to wait until marriage—“especially for men”—that made it so worthwhile.

His dad’s words rang in his memory:

“Farming is hard; raising a family is hard. Really loving them—not just with words but with your life; now that’s hard, son. In short, being a man is hard. Most men walking this earth think they’re men, but thoughts aren’t enough. Wasting your time on video games and the Internet, seeing women as conquests, or having your hand down your pants all the time…all of that just makes you an overgrown infant.”

So in the Pritchard home, they didn’t spend a lot of time on the Internet, or in front of the TV for that matter. There were just too many other, more important things to do. Especially on a family farm.

As much as Benjamin respected, and had absorbed, his family’s values, when he came to college, he figured he’d at least be free to experiment a little. He was kind of conflicted about it, but wasn’t that what you were supposed to do in college?

And here he was, supposedly free—and it was no different from home!

That got him thinking about the contrast between his conservative upbringing and what he saw in other guys in the dorm. He’d been shocked, for example, to find guys have porn on their computers and they don’t even bother to keep it hidden. That brought suddenly to mind a vivid image of a girl that he saw on one guy’s screen that week, causing an equally sudden reaction in his shorts.

The sound of Evan pushing his chair back jerked Benjamin back to reality.

“I think I’m gonna run over to the store,” Evan said, standing. “We’re getting kind of low on a couple things. Need anything?”

Distracted, Benjamin shook his head. Evan went to his room to grab his wallet. He came right back, still in his cut off sweats and basketball shirt, but with sandals on his feet and his keys and wallet in his hand. “Back in a bit,” Evan said as he head out the door.

As he heard the door click shut, a happy realization hit Benjamin. Still thinking of the hot girl’s picture he’d seen, Benjamin quickly got up, with one hand finding its way through the fly in his boxers—causing him to shudder with a wave of pleasure. By the time he flopped down on his bed, he was giving his seven-inch erection long, satisfying strokes.

He panted as he played with the foreskin now drawn back from the head. He looked down at his old friend: it was fairly straight. He let go of it, watching it slap against his flat stomach. He sighed as pre-cum oozed from the slit.

Benjamin reached down, running his hand down his full length until he reached his balls. He had a little hair there, but nothing like what he’d seen on so many guys in the locker room. For whatever reason, he thought of times he’d been next to Trevor when they were changing. He remembered Trevor’s package as similar to his own, except Trevor’s balls were heavier and hairier. Then he thought of Evan, and assumed, from the dark stubble on his face, that he probably had a forest down there—and, he guessed, probably a good sized oak!

Shaking off this strange train of thought, Benjamin summoned the girl back to his thoughts. Soon all he was focusing on was the pleasure that radiated from his crotch through his whole body. He used his thumb to play with the glans, smearing the steady flow of precum around. He felt himself getting closer as he drew deeper and deeper breaths; his whole body seemed to be caught up in it now…

Slam! “Hey Benj, I’m back.”

Benjamin panicked for a moment, fearing his bedroom door might be open. He looked over—it wasn’t; but too late. The moment had passed.

“Shit!”

Chapter 4: Insecurity

Chapter 5: A fateful glance

The year was racing by; swim season had ended with the team doing pretty well. Evan had even taken the time to come to some of Benjamin’s meets. Benjamin had been pretty grateful for that, and he was impressed by how intensely Evan would watch. Benjamin was too intent on the meet himself to realize, meanwhile, just what Evan was focusing on, and who.

After swim season ended, Benjamin had some catching up to do, so for several weeks he really bore down. He saw a little of Allison in a couple of his classes, but he never seemed to have any time for anything else. He’d seen Laura—the girl he met doing laundry—around the dorm, but he hadn’t asked her out, the way he wanted to. Benjamin kept thinking about her—but there always seemed to be something keeping him too busy to pursue anything with her.

As Spring Break drew near, Benjamin knew he couldn’t afford to go anywhere. He wondered if Evan and his friends might have plans, and he starting wondering if Evan would invite him along. But Evan didn’t mention any plans.

With the academic pace increasing for Benjamin, and Evan too, they were seeing each other most days, but not spending a lot of time together. Benjamin was eating more meals in the center with some of his classmates, as they all prepared for midterms. Meanwhile, Evan actually did have a fair amount of work to do, and he was bearing down, too. Now that the semester was winding down, the crunch of papers and tests was starting to hit.

Then, with the break a week away, while they were getting breakfast, Evan mentioned offhandedly that he’d be away for the entire week.

“Yeah?” was all Benjamin said—but he was dying to know more.

“Yeah…Jason’s family has a place down in Florida, I thought I’d go down with him. And some other folks.” It was as if Evan didn’t really want to say more about it, so Benjamin didn’t ask any more.

Later, while working at his library job, Benjamin thought more and more about Evan going away without him for the break. The more he thought about it, the more it bothered him. After going over it yet again in his thoughts, Benjamin suddenly shook his head and slammed his hand on the desk. “This is stupid,“ he thought to himself. “Evan doesn’t owe me anything. And I’m not even sure I can spare the time—I’m still not caught up.” Benjamin was disgusted with himself, and zeroed in his thoughts on the stack of books he had to get back to their places.

After Spring Break, the pace didn’t slack off for Benjamin, but he began to feel pretty good that he’d be OK. When Evan got back from the break, they were able to catch up and spend a little more time together. Still, Evan too had deadlines to meet.

As the year was winding down, once more, Benjamin was racing around; he’d overslept, from having to write two big papers the night before. Now he had to hurry to get the first one turned in at the beginning of class; otherwise, it would count as late. He needed to hit the head, but Evan was showering. No problem. They had this before and they both ducked in as needed.

Simultaneous with a quick knock, Benjamin barged in. “Hey,“ he said, glancing over to Evan, behind the shower glass door. Evan kind of jumped, causing Benjamin to grin. Catching his roommate off-guard was a rare accomplishment. “Sorry man—see you later.“ Just that quick, he was out the door.

A few days later, Evan came back from class, and walked in as Benjamin was folding laundry—Evan’s, as a matter of fact. As he walked in, for a second, it looked like Benjamin was lost in thought, but just that quickly, Benjamin seemed to come back to himself. Evan noticed it was his jockstrap Benjamin was folding.

The next day, Evan was again in the shower—once again, Benjamin did a knock-and-in. But Evan wasn‘t startled this time. This was was the third day in a row that Benjamin had found a reason to poke in while Evan was in the shower. In fact, Benjamin had done it twice already today. “Sorry, I don‘t know where my head is, I just needed…um...” Benjamin paused, looking quickly around the bathroom, until his eyes lit on something. “Some Q-tips. Sorry man, this is the last time, I promise!”

“That’s fine, don’t worry about it.” Evan, faced away from Benjamin, was shaving. He expected to hear the door close again as Benjamin left, then noticed it hadn’t. Glancing over his shoulder, without turning, he saw Benjamin just standing there. When Benjamin saw Evan’s puzzled look, he continued:

“Oh, uh…I—I wanted to ask you, how do I look man?”

“Huh—what?”

“How does this shirt look?”

“Um…I don’t know Benj. Hey, can you give me just a few minutes here to finish up? I’ll be right out, OK.”

“Oh, OK, sure—right. I’ll uh…”

Pause.

“I’ll…I’ll be outside. No problem.”

Evan nodded his head and went back to shaving.

When Evan came out, he was wearing an oversized robe, which he usually just used during the cold months, but had gotten out of his closet that morning. He nodded to Benjamin, then ducked quickly into his room, where he got dressed before he came back out. When he joined Benjamin in the common area, he waited for Benjamin to ask whatever he was asking before, but Benjamin didn’t bring it up. Then Evan noticed the box of Q-tips sitting on the table. “Say, what’d you need the Q-tips for, anyway?”

Benjamin—who had been working on his laptop—looked up with a puzzled expression, as if he had no idea what Evan was talking about. Evan made a funny face but said no more.

“Hey, dude, before I head out, I forgot to tell you; I’m going to be away tonight, tomorrow and over the weekend, OK? Sorry I didn’t mention it, but I’ve got to run down to Cincinnati with Andrew. He needs my help with something at his family’s place. I‘ll be back Sunday night.”

“Oh.” Benjamin said, his face falling slightly. “Well…OK. Have a good time!” As Evan headed out the door, he was pretty sure Benjamin was more disappointed than he let on.

It was about 7 pm Sunday night when Evan came back. He’d been gone since his last class on early Thursday afternoon, and hadn’t seen Benjamin since Thursday morning. As he walked in, Benjamin was at the table, facing his laptop, using Skype to talk to his dad. Until he drew closer, all Evan could hear was Benjamin’s side of the conversation.

“—Dad, even though I’m running hard, I feel really good about the quarter! Yeah, I’m caught up! Would you believe I’m actually a little ahead? Yeah, I know, crazy huh?”

Evan gently closed the door and stepped quietly into the suite. He was wearing a pair of jeans that happened to fit him fairly snugly. He’d made a point to take them along just so he could wear them today—for this moment. He didn’t say anything as he started walking lightly around the perimeter of the room, trying to circle behind Benjamin without disturbing him. Yet he hadn’t taken two steps when Benjamin—with almost bird-like reflexes, turned around to look at Evan.

“Oh, hey! You’re back! Hey that’s…Oh—sorry dad, my roommate just came in. Just a sec, dad, OK? Hey, you need anything?”

Evan shook his head and waved him off, nodding toward the open laptop.

“OK, so…I’m sorry, what were we talking about dad?”

“I was wondering when you’d get back from school?”

“Oh, um, let me see…the last day of school is…”

Evan had continued walking around behind Benjamin, and had gotten himself a beer. While Benjamin was talking to his dad, he was glancing toward his left—toward the fridge where Evan was. As Evan turned from the refrigerator toward the couch, Benjamin’s voice trailed off.

“Ben?”

“Oh, sorry dad. What was that again? Oh, right, last day of school. Well, it’s the 18th, but…” Benjamin’s gaze followed Evan as he walked past the table, just a few feet away—with Evan’s crotch at eye-level.

“But what, Ben? Do you need to stay past the last day? That’s fine, I just want to know when you’re back.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Benjamin! Are you tired or something? You’re not making any sense. I was asking you, when are you back?”

“Yeah, dad, sorry, sorry. Yeah, I guess I am tired.” Benjamin shook his head, and held it with both hands, gazing straight at the screen. “OK, you asked me about the last day: the 18th. I don’t think I need any extra time, but…”

While still holding his head, Benjamin slowly lifted his gaze over the lid of his laptop. Evan had stretched out on the couch and turned on the TV. He’d slouched down just enough that when he shifted, Benjamin could see Evan’s lap. When Evan would shift slightly, Benjamin couldn’t see Evan’s crotch. Benjamin watched Evan’s every move.

“Ben? Benjamin! Hello!” Suddenly, Benjamin realized his dad had raised his voice. He looked back at the screen.

“You there?” Mr. Pritchard was getting irritated.

Benjamin shifted around, shaking his head, clearly frustrated with himself. Then he closed his eyes, and leaned in—very focused.

“OK, I’m sorry dad, I guess I should get to bed or something, but I know I didn’t answer your question. I just figured I’d maybe need a day or two after, that’s all.” Benjamin took a breath—as if finishing that thought was a major accomplishment. He kept his eyes closed.

“OK son. So let’s say you’ll fly back on the 20th, all right? I’m going to get the ticket for you. You’ll get an email as usual, OK?”

Benjamin nodded—he still had his eyes screwed tightly shut. “OK dad, the 20th. I’ll fly home on the 20th.”

“And remember, son, if you have stuff to bring home, just ship it, OK? You have the number for the UPS store over in Clayton? They’ll put it on my account.”

Benjamin, still with his eyes pressed closed, kept nodding. “Yes dad, I remember; it’s in my cell phone.”

“All right, good. Your mom and your brothers and I can’t wait to see you son! We miss you a lot. We love you.”

Benjamin opened his eyes. “I love you too, dad.” He put his hand to the screen, to meet his dads, just as they always did on Skype.

“One more thing, son,” Mr. Pritchard said with wry smile.

“Yeah dad?”

“Son, I know you’re working hard, and that’s great. But get some sleep OK? And, tomorrow, if you can, find something to do to unwind!”

Benjamin laughed wearily and nodded. “OK dad. I promise! Bye dad!”

When Benjamin looked up, the TV was off, and Evan was ducking into his room. “See you in the morning, buddy.”

The next evening, Benjamin was lounging in front of the TV, watching a baseball game.

“Hey Benj.” Evan flopped down on the empty chair.

“Hey, good to see you! I didn’t hear you come in.” Benjamin said as he looked over quickly from the TV. “What’s up?”

No, Evan had no doubt; Benjamin was staring right at his crotch.

“Nothing, man. How’s the game?”

“Um…it’s uh…” Benjamin slowly pulled his gaze back to the TV. Even though the score was on the screen, he was obviously disoriented.

“Um, Benjamin? We have to talk.” Evan reached over and pulled one of the pillows and used it to cover his lap, just as Benjamin’s gaze quickly shifted back. Seeing only a pillow, he blinked and met Evan’s gaze.

“OK, sure man, what about?”

Evan nodded toward the TV and Benjamin clicked it off.

“Look, what I’m going to say is going to sound crazy, but—just listen OK?

“Sure.” Benjamin said.

“You’ve been acting kind of differently the past two weeks.”

“Different? How?” Benjamin asked.

“Uh, dude, I think you know. You’ve been...” Evan paused, took a deep breath, and continued. “Staring at me.”

Benjamin laughed a little uncomfortably. “What are you talking about?”

“Look, I’m not mad or offended or anything.” Evan said, holding his hands in the air, palms open towards Benjamin. “But I need you to admit it, so we can talk honestly about it.”

“About what?” Benjamin said, a hint of a whine in his voice.

“C’mon, buddy—just a minute ago you did it. I walked in here, and your eyes went straight from the TV to…”

“To what?” His tone was defensive. He knew.

Evan’s body language indicated he didn’t want to say—but he had to. “Ben…to my package.”

“What?! Aw c’mon, give me a break! You’re imagining things!”

Evan shook his head.

“You’re being ridiculous. You know I’m not gay.”

“Right. And I never said you were.”

“So it’s laughable to say I’d be checking you out. I mean, look, people look everywhere, right? So sure, how could I avoid looking at your pants once or twice?”

“That’s not what I’m talking about—and you know it. Look, buddy—we’re friends. I’m telling you, I’m not mad, I’m not anything. But it’s obviously bothering you and I want to talk about it.”

Benjamin scoffed. “There’s nothing to talk about. It’s all in your head.”

“Really? OK, let’s see.” With that, Evan scooted down a little in his chair—he knew it would push his shorts up a little and his package would show that much more. As he started to pull the pillow away, Benjamin nervously asked, “What are you doing?”

“If you’re right…nothing. Let’s see.” Keeping his gaze fixed on Benjamin, Evan now leaned forward slowly and deliberately—ensuring the bulge of his manhood was as obvious as possible—and put the pillow on the floor.

Sure enough, Benjamin’s eyes flicked down. He tried to stop himself, but he couldn’t. The sight Evan was giving him was too enticing. Evan didn’t react. He just watched.

Benjamin forced a laugh and looked away. “I don’t know what you’re trying to prove.”

“Maybe nothing. We’ll see.”

“See what? This is a waste of time. I was watching a good game.”

“Go ahead and turn it on. But you won’t be watching it.”

Benjamin tried to look away. He closed his eyes. A couple of times he started to turn his head toward Evan, as if he could catch him looking away, only to see his gaze unmoved. The tension in Benjamin mounted, like a junkie overdue for a fix.

“Just go ahead and look—it doesn’t offend me, I told you. And it’s driving you crazy.”

Benjamin laughed and shook his head—and, hoping that would be cover, he tried to steal another glance at Evan’s crotch. But it was his undoing—a glance quickly turned into a long stare.

“Yep.” Evan spread his legs to give Benjamin a better view.

“No! Fuck!” Benjamin turned deep red and jumped up from the couch. “Fuck!” Alarmed, Evan jumped up and put his hand on his shoulder.

“Buddy, look, it’s all right.”

“Like hell it is. This is so fucked up!” Benjamin shook off Evan’s reassuring hand and started pacing.

Finally, he said, “look, I’m sorry Man. I’m really sorry! I…yeah, I’ve been fucked up for a week, maybe two, I don’t know. Something started happening recently. At first, I didn’t believe it. Then I was trying to deny it. But the past few days…”

“Shhh, it’s all right buddy. Calm down.” Evan said.

“Easy for you to say man! You’re not the one who’s turning…you know.”

“Hold on.” Evan said, holding up his hands in surrender again. “It doesn’t mean that.”

“Well, yeah I think it does. You don’t know what this has been like for me. It’s been crazy; every day it’s gotten worse.” Benjamin said, stopping where he was, his shoulders drooping. “It’s an obsession.” he confessed, his gaze unconsciously tracking Evan’s crotch again.

“Benj, I think I know what’s going on.” Evan said, standing close by.

“How could you?” Benjamin said, looking up into Evan’s eyes. “What, does this happen to you all the time?”

“Not exactly. Look, Benj, I’m sorry about this. You have to trust me now. Believe me, I’m not trying to embarrass you; I’m trying to help. OK?”

“Yeah, but…” Benjamin said, his eyebrows furrowing. “I don’t know what you can do.”

“We’ll see. But first, sit down, OK?” After he did, Evan sat down again, and this time put the pillow back on his lap. Benjamin visibly relaxed.

“OK, you have to calm down, and you have to trust me, and you have to be totally honest, OK? I don’t blame you for denying it, but now we have to get it all out.

“So…look, just to clear the air, just tell me what’s been happening. Say it out loud, no holding back.”

“You want me to say it?” Benjamin asked.

“Please. Trust me.” Evan said.

“Dude you know—you already said it.” Benjamin said, a pleading tone creeping into his voice.

“Trust me, please. Just let’s get it out there. Just say it.”

“Fuck!” Benjamin said, smacking the top of the couch with his palm as he did. “OK. Like you said. I’ve been staring at your crotch. More all the time. Every day it’s worse.”

“And that’s it? You just wanted to see my crotch?” Evan asked.

“No, Man…you know that.”

“Benji, you have to say it.” Evan said, crossing his big arms across his broad chest.

“Shit! All right, whatever. You’re not going to tell anyone this?”

“Not a soul, trust me; I am really trying to help, I promise.”

Benjamin exhaled loudly and then said. “All right. You’re right, we have to be honest. I’ve been staring because every day I’m wanting to see your… your…” Benjamin paused—he seemed to be surprised at himself having stumble for the right word. Evan just waited.

“Your…penis.” Benjamin wrinkled his face, as if somehow that wasn’t the right word.

“Good. Anything else?”

Benjamin exhaled. To his surprise, he felt better. It was out there now.

“And…well, yeah, your whole package! And…well, at this point, why not admit it: it turns me on, man. I mean, right now, I got a sudden rush. And, what the hell! I’ve been dreaming about it.” Benjamin chuckled ruefully. He’d gotten a sudden erection, and glancing down, he could see it showed. Evan nodded slightly in acknowledgment.

“Is that everything?”

“Yeah, this time it is. Thanks.” After a pause, Benjamin added. “So, now what?”

Chapter 6: Going deeper

“OK, Benj, believe it or not, I can explain this. But what I’m going to tell you now is going to sound pretty strange.”

“What, stranger than what we’ve been talking about?” Benjamin said, laughing nervously.

“This is going to blow your mind. You just have to bear with me and listen.”

“OK...” Benjamin said.

“OK. So…” And suddenly, Evan was at a loss for words. He’d thought for a week about how he’d explain this; but now he didn’t know how to begin. He wasn’t going to be able to tell the whole story yet. And anyway, he wasn’t sure which would be harder to believe—the whole truth, or a partial account with obvious holes…

“Benjamin, go into a trance” Evan suddenly commanded—and Benjamin instantly complied.

“Ben, you’re in a trance, and you feel very good right now. Do you feel good right now?”

“Yes Evan.”

“Good. You feel very good right now. You were upset, but now you feel much calmer, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Good. You’re going to keep feeling better now as you listen to my Voice. You feel a lot better. The stress you felt just before is going away. Now you feel good, because you feel safe with me—don’t you Benj?”

“Yes, I do feel safe with you.”

“We’re friends, right?”

“Yes, we’re friends Evan.”

“Have I ever lied to you Benji?”

“I don’t think so, Evan.”

“You trust me?”

“I trust you, Evan.”

“Good Benji. I’m telling you the truth right now. And you feel it, don’t you? You feel that I am being truthful, and that I care for you. Do you feel that?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Does that feel good?”

“It feels very good.”

“Yes, it feels very good. Very, very good. Very safe, doesn’t it?”

“Yes, Evan.”

“That’s right. Because I’m your friend. In fact, we’ve become pretty good friends this year, haven’t we, Benji?”

“Yes, we have.”

“Do you think we could be best friends?”

“Yes, we could.”

“Would you like that, Benj?”

“I would like that, Evan.”

“What? Say it for me.”

“To be best friends.”

“I’d like that too, Benj. I like you. I like you a lot. And I think you like me, don’t you Benj?”

“Yes, Evan I do.”

“Does this feel good?”

“It feels very good, Evan.”

“Good. Now, listen very closely to what I’m going to tell you.” Evan paused, gathering his thoughts. “In a moment, you’re going to wake from this trance. When you do, you’ll remember everything from before the trance, and you’ll remember how stressed you felt. You’ll realize you feel a lot better, and you’ll know it’s because we’re talking. You’ll know that you trust me. You’ll feel good trusting me. Because you do, don’t you Benji?”

“Yes Evan. Very much so.”

“Good. Very good.

“When you wake up, we’ll be talking, and you’ll realize your attention wavered for a moment. But you’ll listen to what I will tell you. You’ll listen closely, won’t you Benji?”

“Yes Evan.”

“Good! I’m going to tell you things that are private to me. Things I’ve never told anyone. I’m going to trust you. I will need you to believe me, even if it seems so very different from anything you’ve ever heard before. Do you understand, Benji?”

“Yes Evan.”

“You will listen?”

“Yes Evan.”

“You believe I am telling you the truth—even if it is confusing or surprising or strange?”

“Yes, I believe you Evan.”

“Good. I will tell you the truth. I won’t tell you everything now, because there’s too much to tell right now; but I will tell you the truth Benji, because I always tell you the truth. I am going to trust you. Do you trust me, Benji?”

“Yes, Evan.”

“Good, Benji, good. That feels very good to trust me, and to know I am trusting you. That’s what close friends—best friends—do, right?”

“Yes Evan.”

“Good. Now, when I count to three, on three, you will come out of the trance. You won’t remember you were in a trance, only that you lost track of our conversation for a moment. But then you’ll listen closely to everything else.

“If ever I need you to go back into a trance, I will say, “Go into a trance Benji!” and you will. Only if I say it, not for anyone else. Do you understand Benji?”

“Yes Evan.”

“Good. I’m counting to three now. One…two…three!”