But I Don’t Really Want This, Chapter 12
Jiggles walked through the door of her office building with trepidation. Good, no one she knew so far. Many different businesses shared this building and she didn’t always see any of her co-workers down here in the reception area. She swiped herself through the turnstile past the reception area, pressed the button for the elevators impatiently, and waited. She was the only one waiting which was rare this time of the morning. Please, please, please, she thought, willing one of the elevators to hurry up.
Ding! The door opened and she rushed in, pressing the close door button repeatedly until the promised action began. Almost through this part of the gauntlet, unscathed. Then it would be a simple matter of avoiding the open plan area of her office, taking the long corridor around to her new office, where, hopefully, she wouldn’t meet anyone.
A polished man’s shoe jammed itself into the almost-closed door. The door started to open again. Hopefully just one guy, hopefully someone from a different office, please! No. It was just one man, and if she could have selected one person that she did not want to meet today it was Jay.
‘Well hey Nicole’, said Jay, with his seemingly non-threatening smile. Or it would have seemed that way if you hadn’t know him. It really was a winning smile, there was no denying that, but the person behind the smile she knew.
‘How was your holiday?’
Jay had been born into a wealthy family, and had had every advantage in life. Not that Jiggles begrudged him that. Her own family hadn’t been poor, though they hadn’t been rich either. The big difference was that her parents had thought her from an early age that we don’t always get everything we want, a lesson that Jay’s parents hadn’t bothered with. On the surface, in fact, it was very surprising that Jay even had a job. He was a playboy with a trust fund, and his monthly income from that was rumoured to exceed what he made through work. And Jay was actually very, very good at his job so his work income was not low.
‘Very nice and relaxing’, smiled Nicole, uh, I’m Jiggles, she reminded herself. ‘How are you?’
All Jay’s clients were like him. Spoiled playboys, and he spoke their language. Of course all his clients were actually far richer than him. He was fancy cars and penthouse rich, they were yacht and mansion rich. This job allowed him a peak at a life that not even he could afford. Many of his clients did not even see him as their consultant, they saw him as their Las Vegas party guy, their fixer who gave as good as he got. It wasn’t unusual for Jay to spend the entire working week on a bender of booze, drugs and women, but all the time earning money for the company. Obviously that didn’t happened in the office, but Jay might announce on a Friday that client X or Y was in town the next week and that he might not be contactable. Everyone knew what it meant.
‘Also good, hey, isn’t this your first day as a manager? You’re one of us now’, he winked at her.
Ugh, thought Nicole. During Nicole’s second week for the company she had learned his true nature. As he was with every new girl, that is, every attractive new girl, he had been very helpful, ensuring that everything was set up for her, answering her questions, encouraging her in her work, always making time for her. She had been warned by the other girls around her that this was his usual act, he wasn’t being nice just to be nice. Still, he hadn’t tried to ask her out or proposition her, so Nicole didn’t feel comfortable telling him she wasn’t interested, and she was grateful for the help and sympathetic ear.
‘Thank you Jay, I’m so pleased’.
On her second week he had phoned her. He was in a meeting with a client and he needed someone to bring a document from his office to the meeting. For legal reasons this document couldn’t be copied or scanned, he explained, and he needed someone he could trust to bring it to him, without letting it out of their sight. So Nicole had driven it down to one of the hotels on the south end of the strip. then taken it up the private elevator to the rooftop suite. A security guard, not a hotel security guard, possibly the client’s bodyguard, had greeted her and led her down a corridor. He opened the door and the music rushed through to greet her.
‘Trust me, you’ve got what it takes to do this job well’.
The huge room was a mess. Clearly people had been going wild here. But the party had been the previous night and the guests were all out on the private terrace, some managing their come down, but most still partying. About 5 guys, one of them was Jay and the other she recognised as his client. About a dozen girls. All attractive.
‘Thanks’, she responded, wanting the elevator to hurry up.
Jay had seen her and came up to her. ‘Nicole, brilliant, thanks for that document’, he took it off her and placed it down on a table half covered in drinks, not seeming to realise or care that he had put this supposedly important document on a sticky puddle of some coloured cocktail. Nicole looked at him, his pupils were too big, then she noticed some of the guests approaching. Two guys, one of them the client, some girls in various states of undress.
‘You weren’t exaggerating Jay’, said one of the guys, not the client. ‘I told you, Jay doesn’t exaggerate’, said the client. Nicole hadn’t been worried up until this point. She had been at these kinds of parties before, she knew how to handle herself. If they all hadn’t been so high maybe they could have concealed the truth from her, but as it was, she didn’t even have to do any work to find out what Jay had been up to. He had been telling the other guys all night and all day about the most beautiful girl in the world who had started working at the company. He told the other guys that he would get her to come to the party, but if any of them slept with her, he’d accept a $1,000 finders fee.
She had made her escape and never told anyone. She was new at the company and didn’t want one of the leading account manager’s to become her enemy. She didn’t tell Will because she knew that he wouldn’t agree to take it lying down. Jay had tried to pimp her and she had kept his secret, hating herself for that.
As the elevator continued to rise, Nicole noticed that he was looking at her more intently than before. ‘Please no’, she thought.
‘Did you,... did you have a boob job?’
Fuck, she screamed internally. Why did he have to be the first?
‘Your breasts are bigger’.
She was too embarrassed to make eye contact.
She was just about able now to make eye contact with him, but couldn’t think of anything to say.
‘But you had the hottest lips I ever saw, why?’.
Shit, that’s a question she had prepared for, but she had always imagined a sympathetic woman asking her, not Jay.
‘Your breasts are looking great though, I mean, I wouldn’t say I’m a huge fan of fake tits, I mean I like looking at large breasts, they look great, yours look fantastic, but I prefer the natural feel in my hand, you know what I mean?’
Still no response from Jiggles.
‘Ha’, he laughed out loud. ‘You are so lucky you were offered the promotion before you had the surgery! Ha, ha, ha!’
The elevator door open, he winked at her, ‘Have a great day’, and walked out.
What the fuck, thought Nicole, what did he mean by that? Fucking asshole! Does he mean that they wouldn’t have offered me the promotion had I already had the surgery? Does he mean that people won’t take me as seriously? Or does he mean that he doesn’t take me as seriously?
She looked down at her new breasts, at Jiggles’s new breasts. There they were. She hadn’t worn a tight top, she hadn’t want to draw attention on her first day back. A loose blouse, but it’s fabric was forced to rest on her now more generous swell. Previously this blouse would have hidden her breasts. It wasn’t really possible to hide these breasts in anything that didn’t belong to Will, and she couldn’t wear his hoodies to work.
They used to be so easy to ignore, but now... They weren’t obscene. Large yes, but not unrealistically so. She had already had to fight prejudices in her career for being a beautiful woman working in an industry aimed at pleasing rich clients. She was constantly noticing the surprise on clients’ faces when they realised that she had tasks far more difficult than than sending mails, answering phones and making coffee. Would she have to fight harder now? Fuck him.
Jiggles made it to her new office without meeting anyone else, but of course it was locked and she didn’t have a key. She looked through the glass. There was no computer set up in there yet. She wouldn’t be able to hide in her office today, she, Jiggles, would have to be proactive, getting out there, getting help to have everything setup.
And Jay preferred her old lips too. She hated that she agreed with him. Why did he have to be right about that? Oh, her new lips were really fun, she loved it when she caught Will looking at them, which she did just as often as she caught him looking at her breasts. To encourage him she had decided to try moving them about more when she wasn’t using them. Pursing them or putting a finger to them when thinking or listening to him, licking them, keeping them moist. She wanted to be able to unconsciously do these actions more often, because she knew it got Will’s attention.
There were times when she would pose with them in front of the mirror, when she loved what she saw, when she thought they looked so sexy, like a fantasy, but she knew that given the choice that she would choose to have her old lips, her old perfect, human lips. Did they look stupid? She knew her old lips had looked great. And she knew, or at least she believed, that when most guys stared at her breasts, they were staring in appreciation, but for her lips, did they stare in appreciation, or did they think she looked stupid?
She thought back over the last few days.
The bandages had come off her chest a week before, the doctor had been pleased with her progress. That was the day after her lips had been done. Apart from the ever so slightly increased size, they were still swollen as a result of the procedure, and so they slightly affected her speech. The usual muscle movement she had employed her entire life to make v’s and f’s and ph’s no longer produced exactly the sound that she wanted, and so for those first three days she had regularly been mispronouncing words.
‘I sounded so stupid’, she later complained to Will, as she stood topless for him. ‘And what you leapt be..., what you left behind’, she pronounced slowly and precisely, ‘couldn’t hap helped. Have helped’. She refused to let one slip of pronunciation go unchecked. ‘He made a point ob tell,... of telling me it was very important in future that I keep organic liquids away brom, from surgical wounds’.
‘It wasn’t that bad’, he said, waving away her complaints, ‘it was only on the surface, and the smell was gone. Besides, I have to say’, he walked behind her, putting his arms around her, pulling her in tightly, and whispered down into her ear, ‘it really turned me on to know you were wearing my cum on those bandages.’
‘Really?’, she replied, all of a sudden curious and eager to hear more.
‘Oh yeah, really. Tell me, did your embarrassment have any effects on you?’ An order.
‘I knew that I was in that embarrassing situation because of you. All your commands had brought me to that place. It made me think of all those commands, and, it started to feel good’, she explained. She turned around smiling, falling into his arms gently—neither of them wanted to squash her breasts. They kissed.
‘Also’, he withdrew, ‘your mispronunciations are so hot’.
‘No!’, she laughed, embarrassed, but interested.
‘Really! I want to take a video of you speaking, but you cannot correct mispronunciations. Find a positive article about blow jobs on the Internet , written from a woman’s perspective, I want to make a recording of you reading it. Very soon you won’t be mispronouncing anymore, I, I mean we, need a record of this’.
The last day of her holiday, Nicole and Will were making out on the couch. They had not been having as much sex for fear of impeding the healing process, but cunnilingus and fellatio were at an all time high.
‘You gave me a name that night that I got drunk, cum girl I think?. I didn’t remember the next day, but I remembered eventually.’
‘Yeah, I just needed you to change the subject that night’.
‘But you stopped giving me names. Back when you wrote the contract, you acted like you would have a lot of names for me, but you don’t use that clause at all.’
‘Yeah, I would like to use it, but it never felt natural’.
‘You would like to use it, do you have a name in mind?’
He grabbed as much of her ass as he could in one hand and gave it a squeeze. ‘Jiggles I think would be appropriate’.
She opened her mouth and eyes wide in mock shocked outrage, aware that the expression she was making was similar to one she would have made in actual shocked outrage if Will had said that to her a year earlier.
‘But the problem is that it is always forced, you know that your name is Nicole, I think it would be really hot if you believed your name was something else, if it was Jiggles. It would be really hot if I called you Nicole and you told me that that wasn’t your real name, and you would have to believe that.
‘But I wouldn’t want to tell other people that, only you’.
‘Oh yeah, definitely. As you interacted with other people you would accept that Nicole was the name you had to use, but deep down inside you would know that your name was really something else. That would be hot’.
Nicole’s hand had slipped between her legs. She bit her lower lip, God that looks so good, thought Will. ‘Let me be Jiggles’, she asked.
‘You won’t believe it’, he said.
‘Order me to pretend I do’, she said.
‘OK, for the next two weeks, your name is Jiggles, and after you cum, you have to pretend to believe that around me. Around other people, you still use the name Nicole, but try to think of yourself as Jiggles’.
‘Jiggles’, she said, softly, savouring the sound, enjoying the sensations from her fingers.
‘What’s your name?’
‘My name is Jiggles’, she replied.
‘You can’t use the word “my” when we are alone together. What is your name’.
‘Ugh, Jiggles’s name is Jiggles’, she sing-songed back to him. She leaned into kiss him, and started stroking him slowly, deliberately, with her slippery hand.
‘You don’t believe it though, do you?’
‘I will pretend to very soon’.
‘You can’t say the word “I” to me for the next two weeks’.
‘Jiggles will pretend very soon’.
‘Pretending to believe isn’t the same as believing.’
‘Maybe we could try hypnosis, if you would like that’, she suggested.
‘Hypnosis, what for?’
‘To make me believe that Jiggles is Jiggles’s name’, she moaned, ‘if you think it would be hot.’
‘I would. Nice idea, you’ve been coming up with some good stuff recently’.
‘Jiggles has been reading a lot about sex recently’, she replied proudly back, waggling her eyebrows.
He gently caressed her breast, still afraid to cause harm. He squeezed her ass, and then gave it a slap. ‘Jiggles is such an appropriate name for you now.’
‘Jiggles’, she said softly, enjoying the feel of the word, then biting her lower lip again. Will leaned in.