The Remote Process 4
It was sometime in the 3am range. I was riding the train back alone from Whitney’s place, a twenty-thirty minute trip give or take. The car rocked gently side to side as it raced along the tracks towards its destination. It was pitch dark out and I was tired (You can guess why). The device sat in my coat pocket, my body slumped over the chair in front of me. My mind was already thinking about things that I wanted to do with it, things that I never would have considered doing before.
Everyone has their own thoughts, their own sexual dreams, things that we think about any time in a given day, things that we wouldn’t act on, things that couldn’t be acted on. When you’re a kid just entering puberty it might be boning that hot babysitter or seeing the tits of that somehow gorgeous, nerdy teacher. Or maybe when you get older maybe the object of your focus is that stunning brunette of a crappy boss that you have. Or maybe that random fine looking woman you encounter on the street. Letting you do anything to them, wanting you to do anything to them. Those were the kinds of things running through my mind, things that before a couple days ago had been nothing more than accepted fantasies.
Things that the device in my chest pocket granted the possibility of becoming reality.
The train doors slid open then. A pair of girls entered the car then, a blonde and a redhead. I glanced up at them, the wonderfully tight jeans, the plush overcoats. The extra wide smiles on their faces, the way that they almost fell on top of each other. It was obvious where they had been. The next question was what the hell were they doing going out on a Sunday night/Monday morning?
Their eyes paused on me for a second before deciding to take a seat on the far end of the rail car away from me. I watched them start talking, their words too quiet over the roar of the train, not like I really cared. My eyes followed them briefly. I didn’t need to look long to know that they were both pretty damn cute specimens. It was only me and them alone in the train car.
A tired smile came to my face as I thought of Whitney. I would always love her for who she was, but there were definitely some things that she just couldn’t deliver on.
I pulled the blackberry out of my pocket.
A quick scan brought their numbers up on the screen. I tagged them as and Girl A, Girl B.
My mind raced. My thumbs went to work. I already knew it was too public a place to do anything serious, the call feature was out but there was definitely something worth it in the texting. Maybe I could have a little fun.
For the first one, the blonde I typed:
Ur horny for ur friend next to you.
I clicked the send button. I watched the blonde woman’s eyes flutter for a moment, a certain air added to her eyes, a warmth of attention offered to the girl next to her. She stared at her friend longer. Her hand rose and rested against her shoulder. The other friend seemed to ignore it.
Otherwise little changed. I’d figured that I’d have to do more.
I brought up Girl B, the red head, my thumbs again went to work.
Ur friend’s lips are hypnotic. U crave their touch. U want to make out with her.
And that’s when things started to get a little interesting. The redheaded had been the main one talking. I watched her lips suddenly stop. Her eyes focusing on the mouth of the woman sitting next to her. Her head wavered as her eyes followed the movement of the blonde woman’s head. She wouldn’t stare at anything else.
The other side of the train car suddenly went silent. I saw the blonde cast a furtive glance towards me. I tried to prevent myself from being as obvious as I could. Out of the corner of my eye I watched her lay a hand along the side of the red head. She leaned in closer, stopping, turning back up towards me.
It was obvious how she was reading the situation. It was obvious what she wanted to do. It was obvious what she wouldn’t do as long as I was there.
But that could be fixed.
U don’t care if he sees. In fact u enjoy the attention.
And that was all that it took. I watched the woman reach for her friend’s head with both hands pulling it close towards hers. Her body shifted over, straddling her from the front. Her hips resting on the lap of her friend. Her head bent into hers. Her back lay to me. I couldn’t see anything, but it was pretty obvious to me what was going on.
Their bodies rocked together for several moments. The blonde swayed in the lap of her partner. I’m not sure if I imagined it, but I could swear that I heard the lip smacking over the dull roar of the train.
I let my eyes stare at them. After all, what did it matter now? I had no idea if they had been lesbians/bi-sexual before, but it was pretty obvious now that neither cared.
She turned her head back towards me, a twinkling in her eye, a knowing smile crossing her face as our eyes met. She enjoyed my stare. And honestly I enjoyed staring.
I couldn’t help but smile back. Even given everything that had happened that night I began to feel aroused at what I was seeing. My thoughts strayed into thinking about pressing my lips into that woman’s own, groping at her breasts, making her moan softly, making her want me inside of her.
I’d always preferred the darker skinned women, but cute was cute, and both of them definitely had something attractive in their bright/lust filled faces. Curves were a little harder to figure out with the kind of clothes they had on, but that was hardly something I couldn’t find out intimately.
I could feel myself grasping at the blackberry, the next instructions already formed in my head.
U want the stranger to join in.
I could feel my finger edging towards the key pad, with almost every intention of making this a “come back to my place” moment. Hell I could make Katie want to join in. I was going to tear off their clothes, suck at those glorious tits, and ride them like beastial animals. Yeah, it’s a clichéd analogy, fuck you.
But even as that thought came I stopped myself.
As tempting as the thought was I knew that I was okay at the moment. Twice in one day had given me just enough balance to let my other head at least do some thinking.
Still it was a really nice show.
My head turned up as the canned voice of the train system called out, declaring that my stop was next.
I stood up from my seat, walking towards the door next to the two of them.
“Do you like what you see?” I heard the red head say
I just smiled, my eyes unabashedly taking them in, but my body facing the sliding doors. She turned her head back towards her partner. Their full lips tugging and licking at each other. The train grounded to a halt. The doors opened and I stepped out.
Yeah I could have. Yeah I wanted to. But there had to be a point, a limit where you told yourself you had to stop. It was like Derrick had said, “You get good guilt free sex, she does it the way you want it, and you just move on. She doesn’t even have to remember it.” There was a certain personal philosophy held in those words. It was a certain personal philosophy that I now realized I shared.
I pulled the device out of my pocket.
Ur drunk, this is a one- time thing. U don’t want to do anything like this again.
My head turned up as the train pulled away with a loud roar. I could still see the two girls going at it as they disappeared from sight. The train moving on to another stop, another place. I stood alone on the platform watching it go. The two tail lights disappearing off into the darkness.
My finger went down to the send button and pressed it. I paged through the address book in the blackberry. The two girl’s tags appeared and I deleted their numbers.
This was just a one -time thing. I was just going to move on.
The roar of the train disappeared into silence, as I pulled my winter coat on tighter around me and began to walk away.
I’m really too self reflective a person to ever let it become a matter of anything permanent or humiliating. That wasn’t what I wanted. Evening knowing that I could get away with it didn’t matter. Knowing that I could be doing some serious long term damage bothered me. And if I was going to keep this whole thing casual, fun, I couldn’t do something like that.
My boots dropped down the thick metal stairs as I stepped away from the elevated tracks. My mind was already looking ahead, imagining the warm apartment waiting for me three blocks away.
Those girls were going to have a hell of a story to tell the next day. Or maybe they wouldn’t tell anything. Whatever the case it was out of my hands now, a moment in time, a moment gone.
That knowing smile came to my lips as my feet hit the sidewalk. This was just the start of it for me, the start of a process I guess. With Katie it had been a matter of discovery, surprise, immediate action. Whitney was an exploration, figuring out what the device could do. Whitney was about experimenting with it and realizing just how open the possibilities really were. Now I knew, now I was comfortable with it. So what happened next?
Oh such rhetorical questions.
Everyone has their accepted fantasies; the hot boss, the sweet babysitter, that cute nerdy teacher. Add to the list if you like, but those three existed as the primary sources of my interest. People and positions that had been true in my life, that were true in my life. Three fantasies, three things that I had never had the pleasure of indulging in any literal sort of way.
The presence of the device being felt like a burning sensation in my chest pocket. The possibility that what had just been an accepted fantasy could suddenly become a reality.
And would.