Fuck the Police
by Pan
“License and registration please.”
Nick sighed, and leaned over to his glovebox. Pulling out the necessary documentation, he passed it over to the female police officer who had pulled him over.
“Is there a problem, officer?”
“No problem, sir. Just a routine check.”
Despite her words, Officer Hurwitz didn’t like the look of the teenager, driving a car that was clearly far too expensive for a kid his age to be behind the wheel of.
Must be a rich brat, she thought to herself. That, or there’s something fishy going on.
“Where’s your partner?” he asked, as she shone her flashlight onto his papers. Everything seemed to be in order—the car was in his name. New, too—he’d just driven it off the lot that morning.
“Don’t need one,” she replied shortly. “Not for highway patrol.”
“Of course.”
After a quick check of his vehicle’s perimeter, Officer Hurwitz handed back his license and registration, and thumped the roof of his car twice.
“Okay sir,” she said. “You’re free to go.”
“Are you sure?” Nick said, a concerned look on his face. “You haven’t even given me a breathalyser.”
A part of Officer Hurwitz wanted to write the kid a ticket for talking back, but after a second she realized he was right. She wouldn’t be doing her duty if she wasn’t thorough.
“Wait here,” she said.
“Why?”
“So that I can get the breathalyser.”
“Oh, I promise I’m not sick,” Nick said, staring into her eyes. “You can quite safely administer it yourself.”
Reaching out and grabbing his chin, Officer Hurwitz moved her mouth onto his and began breathalysing the teen boy. It took longer than normal—she thought she detected a hint of alcohol on his breath, but after thoroughly exploring his mouth with her tongue for a few minutes, she was confident that she’d been mistaken.
“Thank you for your time,” she said. “You’re free to go.”
With a smile, Nick nodded in response. He lowered his sun visor to return his license, but as he did, a small plastic bag with a single pill fell onto his lap.
“I swear, that’s not mine,” he said far too quickly, a terrified tone suddenly entering his voice. Officer Hurwitz smiled. She hadn’t managed to get him for drinking, but she knew there was something odd about this kid.
“Sir, I’m going to have to search the car.”
“Strip search?”
“Of course.”
Nick stood beside his car, holding Officer Hurwitz’s torch for her, as she slowly and systematically strip-searched his car. By the time she was done, her uniform, gun, and underwear were in a small pile beside his door, and she was shivering slightly at the cold.
“Did you find anything?”
“Sir,” she said, frustrated by the results, “I’m going to have to ask you to remain silent while I call for backup.”
To her surprise, no one responded to her call. Her increased bust-size meant that she normally got a great signal, but as she tweaked her dials again and again, they just got harder and harder while her calls went unanswered.
“Do you want me to try?” the kid asked politely, and Officer Hurwitz just glared at him.
“Of course not,” she snapped, before taking a deep breath. She couldn’t let him get to her. Punk kids like this were the worst part of working the highway patrol—they were so used to getting their own way.
But she did need backup, and so after a few seconds, she went against her instincts and caved.
“Fine,” Hurwitz said through gritted teeth. “See if you can get anyone on the line.”
To her surprise, Nick seemed extremely familiar with her equipment, clamping his mouth over the microphone and doing a call-out on all channels. He switched between the two radios a few times, eventually standing up proudly.
“I think I got someone,” he said. “They should be here in ten.”
“Perfect,” she said with a smile. The policewoman knew exactly what she could do to knock the kid down a peg. “That leaves us just enough time for a cavity search.”
Nick gulped.
“All the cavities?”
“All the cavities,” she said, enjoying his discomfort. “Now strip.”
Getting onto her knees in front of him, Officer Hurwitz took her time in exploring Nick. Even after her jaw started to ache, she kept on going, knowing that she was finally giving the cocky teen a taste of the real world, where not everything went his way.
It wasn’t until he was gasping and panting that she decided he’d had enough. Spreading her legs, she leaned against the car and turned around with a cruel grin.
“Cavity number two,” she said, enjoying the sweat that coated every inch of his naked body.
She gasped as the cavity search began. It wasn’t yielding any results, but she’d suspected it wouldn’t—this was just for her. His panting got louder and louder as he slammed her against the car. A part of the policewoman wondered if she was going a bit overboard, but she remembered that she had found a pill in his car—legally speaking, she was well within her rights to search him as thoroughly as she liked.
Officer Hurwitz was just about to finish the search, when to her surprise, her young perp started twitching and shaking.
“Jesus,” she said in shock, “are you alright?”
A few long, loud grunts were the only answer she got, and Nick slammed her against the car so hard she was worried that it would do damage to her dual-radios.
He pulled out, and slithered onto the ground, where the policewoman stood over him in concern.
“Kid…kid, are you okay?”
“I’m great,” he said, sounding exhausted.
Officer Hurwitz’s hands immediately went up to her radio, tweaking and pulling as she desperately tried to get a signal.
“Tell me—what are you on? What was the pill?”
“The pill? Oh, that…it was just a tic tac.”
Her eyes widened as she realized what he was saying. She’d just conducted an illegal strip-search AND explored two of the three cavities…all over a tic tac.
“Okay, Nick, here’s the deal. How about you drive on, and we pretend this never happened. Sound fair to you?”
Smiling, Nick looked up to her.
“Hmmm…” he said. “On one condition.”
“This isn’t a negotiation, kid. Take it or leave it.”
“Hear me out.”
“Fine—what do you want?”
“We’ll call it even…if you complete the cavity search.”