LOOK BOTH WAYS
9
My ways are perfect, he thought, as he walked back past his side of the car, because I seek not my own will, but the will of the Source from whence I have come, and this time, His will be done.
He had spent a few minutes, as she had, peering under the bonnet and he had seen that which she had not. The belt, hidden within the radiator shield, had broken and been thrown into the fan, which had then thrown it out somewhere back along the road. That had been the bang, he concluded. The burning smell must have come from the air conditioner, he figured, although he had absolutely no idea if that was right.
He slipped down into the bucket seat beside her and sighed softly. The hot leather stuck to his wet back and shirt. His face sheened with sweat and his brow glistened with hers.
He glanced at her and then looked closely. She was beautiful. Her eyes were closed in repose. She breathed through her nose. Her arms lay loosely on her lap, from which extended her legs slightly splayed.
‘Try it now,’ he said quietly, then smiled at her, ‘but don’t expect the air conditioner to work. I think you’ve lost the belt. That might have been the bang we heard.’
Her eyes sprang open. She sat up straight in her seat and looked at him, her eyes wide with hope.
‘Really?’ She asked excitedly. ‘I thought you didn’t know anything about cars?’
‘I don’t,’ he grinned, noticing the shiny sweat running freely down the sides of her cheeks. She was radiant in her body’s own natural heat.
He watched her tentatively turn the ignition key, knowing she was holding her breath. He hoped he was right. The car’s engine fired into life immediately. For several minutes then they both sat there with the car idling over, waiting to see if they could smell anything burning.
He smiled as he saw her nostrils flare widely, as she sniffed the air suspiciously. There was no burning smell. He smiled with her when she turned her head to face him.
‘I’ll sit here and become a grease spot,’ she grinned at him, as she pulled the T-bar down into gear. ‘But at least we’re not going to die of thirst in the desert.’
When at last you look up to the son of man from your bended knees, he thought—you will know who I am, and that I delivered you my words and deeds. I am your good shepherd and my flock will know me by them.
Slowly the car gained speed, but she did not drive as fast as she had been. Every now and then she would first lift one hand from the wheel and stare at it, as if studying it. Then she would do the same with the other.
He smiled softly at her actions and her look of mild disbelief that came with the slight shaking of her head each time. He closed his eyes.
They drove with the windows of the car down, but the air that bathed them both, at speed, was hot and dry, and made them hotter than they had been.
I am the good shepherd, he puzzled, not knowing why as he rested in the forced heat that bathed him briskly—who no longer gives up my living life for the sheep outside, but will seek always to bring them in. I am the One shepherd and no longer the hired hand of religions all.
‘Great!’ He suddenly heard her exclaim, excitedly. ‘Over there! Look!’
He sat up straight in his seat and turned to look where she pointed. It was a number of buildings grouped together, about half a mile off to the left of the road.
‘There must be a road up here!’ She claimed to suspect. ‘I drank all my water long ago. Maybe they’ve got some there?’
She was right. He smiled. A road of dirt ran off to the left and seemed to head toward the buildings. She slowed the car and turned into it then bumped the vehicle gently along until she turned off the ignition when the car came swiftly to a halt.
He opened the door and got out then stretched, seeing her do the same. He had seen her breasts jutting full and firm as she had done so. She had seen him see and he knew that, but he did not feel ashamed or guilty. He stirred to life and smiled, softly.
Even in the desert heat I live, he mused, as he followed her up to the large factory doors of the biggest building of them all. She tried the door, but it was locked. There were no windows low enough on the building, which could be looked into.
‘Damn!’ He heard her curse, as she turned and headed for the next largest building in the group.
He smiled and followed, wondering what the hell he was doing back in the desert. Then he grinned. But it was not the same desert, he concluded, as he heard her curse when the second building’s door failed to open. It, too, had no windows low enough on its walls that could be climbed to.
‘Do you thirst spiritually?’ He gently said aloud then wondered why he had said that. She had not heard him and was rushing ahead toward the third building, not as large as the second or the first.
‘Come to me and drink.’ He said softly as he followed. ‘For they that believe in me out of their innermost natural being will flow rivers of living water.’
Again, he smiled softly as he heard her curse. There was only one building left, nowhere near as large as the others, but quite smaller. Maybe it was a kitchen, where all used to eat, he guessed, knowing the place had been deserted a long time, from the dust so thick on the steps of each, when he saw.
She walked up to the door and grasped the handle firmly, shaking it like a mad woman, possessed. It was locked. Again, she cursed, only not as loud, but in a defeated way. He continued walking around the building to her left, while she backed into the door and slid slowly downward to rest on her knees, as if in prayer.
It was a kitchen, he guessed, as he came to the back door, or a storeroom where things were kept until needed. He tried the door gently. It was locked, as expected. He smiled as he forced slightly, but firmly, with hands and hips, and then it was not. He grinned like a male.
I come to teach you, he thought—but not with parables, this time. There is so much in your lives that I could condemn, but I have come with another message. This is the message that I speak to the world. I will love you all until it hurts, as I have been hurt by love not given when needed; for it has been proven by you that when you do not listen, you must feel. And so I have come so you that might feel my presence, truly.
Then his grin softened into the smile of a natural male coming on heat.
Give my Father his just due, he thought. And give me what is mine.