MIKE THE SOMNAMBULIST
Act 2 (Part 5)
by StageShowMM
When I woke up, I was seated at the front of the stage in the middle of a group of three chairs. To my left, I saw that hipster kid Dylan, who for some reason my last memory of was running around the stage yelling about his balls. He seemed a lot calmer now, though he was still sitting in the nude for some reason, albeit looking completely alert.
Also in the nude, and to my right, was my friend Josh. I did a double-take when I noticed him, having forgotten he too had been naked before (where? when?). He seemed more out of it than Dylan, but was also looking around, albeit groggily.
“Dude, why are you naked?” I asked, elbowing him. He looked down and then over at me quizzically.
“I’m not. Why aren’t you?”
I looked down too. T-shirt, sandals, shorts. I seemed to be the only one who was fully dressed. “’Cause we’re in public,” I said, bewildered. Why did he want me naked?
“Ah, you three are awake! Looks like we can begin the interview segment of our show.” I looked over in the direction the voice was coming from. Striding out from behind Josh was the hypnotist guy from before. I couldn’t remember how long we’d been up here, but he’d been trying to hypnotize us all night...
“What the hell’s going on, man? Can we just get out of here?” I asked, trying to take charge. Enough was enough. I’d been letting this guy play his (unsuccessful) monkey games all night.
“Sure thing, Mike,” he replied cheerfully. “I just wanted to get to know you guys a little better before we call it an evening. That all right with you?”
I sighed. “I guess, if it’s quick.” We were supposed to be at the beach a while ago. I didn’t know how long, but I was sure it was a while by now.
“Awesome, man. This audience loves you. How ’bout we give it up for Mike?” The hypnotist patted me on the shoulder and the whole room burst into cheers and applause. It was honestly a bit astounding. All I’d been doing was sitting here...
“Where you from, man?”
“Uh... St. Louis,” I said, looking up. It felt weird being interviewed by a guy who was standing while I was sitting... almost like he had something over me or was more powerful or something. I wouldn’t have minded getting up on his level.
“That’s cool. And you’re here on Spring Break with your friends?”
“Yeah, uh, Hector, Ryan, and Josh,” I stammered, still nervous speaking in front of a roomful of people, even with such easy questions.
“That’s this guy here, right?” asked the hypnotist, turning to my friend. I nodded.
“Nice to meet you, Josh. Thanks for coming up,” said the hypnotist, taking Josh’s hand. Josh shook it, unsteadily.
“How about a big hand for Josh?” said the hypnotist, eliciting another thunderous round of applause.
“We’re all really glad you’re here. Is this your first time visiting this bar?”
“Nah, man, I’ve been coming here awhile,” said Josh. What the fuck was he talking about? Before we left for this trip, he said he’d never been in this state.
“That’s awesome, man. So, you’re a regular.”
“Yeah, I know the owner.”—What the fuck?
“Cool, man, what’s his name?”
“Uh… Daredevil Dave,” Josh blurted, seemingly out of nowhere.
I stared at my friend like he was crazy. What the hell was he talking about? Even he looked surprised at that one. The audience was for some reason in hysterics.
“Fuck, that’s awesome,” said the hypnotist, badly holding back a laugh. “And I’m so sorry, I’m so bad with names. You were, again…?”
“Justin Bieber,” Josh nodded confidently.
“Nice to meet you, Justin,” the hypnotist said, taking Josh’s hand. The audience was roaring.
I shook my head, slack-jawed. Was this some kind of bit? Was Josh in on it? Or maybe the hypnotist had made him start saying nonsense? That couldn’t be it. I knew for a fact this stuff was bullshit, and so did Josh. He wasn’t hypnotized. He was wide awake.
“Listen, I don’t wanna leave these other guys high and dry for too long, so why don’t you just sit tight and we’ll talk more later, okay?” asked the hypnotist. Josh nodded.
“Now I wanna get a word or two in with Dylan,” said the hypnotist, striding behind me. “Well, maybe just one...” The audience tittered. What the hell was he talking about?
“Now Dylan, I just wanted to ask you a few quick questions before we wrap up, is that all right?”
Dylan looked up at the hypnotist from behind his thick-rimmed glasses and nodded. “Yes.”
“I was just wondering if you’ve been having fun in the show.”
“Yes.”
Dylan looked around a bit, as if almost startled he replied in the affirmative.
“That’s great. So, if I invite you back tomorrow, you’ll be ready to volunteer all over again?”
“Yes,” Dylan nodded, before clamping a hand over his mouth, eyes widening.
“That’s great! But I should warn you, tomorrow’s show is probably gonna be even more humiliating. You sure you’d be okay with that?”
Dylan twisted his neck a bit, like his mouth was leaping to escape his hands. “Yes!” he gushed, before clamping his hands down harder, eyes bugging out in shock.
“Would you like me to hypnotize you to stand out front in nothing but a pair of panties and high heels, strutting around with a sign to promote the show?”
Again, Dylan’s mouth lunged up, seeming to leap out from behind his hand. “YES!” He clamped both hands down, eyes bulging, head shaking “no” in terror.
“Tell me the truth, Dylan: did I pretty much make a complete asshole out of you tonight?”
Dylan yanked his head back to again escape the mouth clamp. “YES!” he enthused, beaming for a second before his face fell, completely defeated.
“And I bet you’re ready for more, aren’t you?”
Dylan hung his head, sounding completely demoralized this time. “Yes…” he murmured.
“Good boy, Dylan. Stay stuck in that chair,” said the hypnotist, patting him on the shoulder condescendingly. Dylan hung his head, looking like he was ready to cry.
“Hey, leave him alone, man,” I said, starting to get angry. “Can’t you see he’s not having fun?”
“Oh, you’re having fun, aren’t you, Dylan?” asked the hypnotist, holding out his mic again.
Dylan nodded sullenly, still staring down. “Yes,” he murmured weakly.
“See, Mikey? Nothing to worry about.” The audience tittered.
“Let us the fuck out of here. I don’t know what you’ve been trying to do but this whole thing’s a crock,” I said. Someone had to stand up to this jerk. I wasn’t sure what he was doing to Dylan, but it wasn’t hypnosis. Seemed more like brow-beating to me.
“Aw, Dylan doesn’t mind. I didn’t even ask him anything sensitive. But I bet Josh wouldn’t mind telling us something private.”
Josh shrugged. At the same instant, though, I realized I’d completely forgotten—I’d been meaning to tell this guy something important all night.
“Wait, man,” I said, grabbing the hypnotist’s arm and nearly pulling the mic to my mouth. “I need to tell you something.”
“What’s up?” he asked.
What was it? I knew there was something I wanted to tell him. Something… secret.
“When… when I was eleven…” I struggled. “I had a wet dream and… thought I wet the bed.”
The audience burst out in applause and whistles. I couldn’t understand why they were laughing. This was really important.
“That’s great, Mike, I can totally see that. Little stud like you…” The audience tittered. What the fuck? How was that an appropriate thing to say?
“Let’s see if Josh has any secrets he’d like to share. Josh, what’s your favorite sexual position?” the hypnotist asked.
“Dick in her ass and... balls in the pussy,” Josh blurted, looking almost as perplexed as I felt as the words tumbled out.
“That’s gotta take talent,” the hypnotist deadpanned as the audience cracked up. “And who’s your favorite person you’ve fucked?”
“My… grandma,” Josh blurted, again looking totally bewildered. The audience was dying.
“That’s pretty fucked up. Hey Mike, has Josh ever told you anything that private before?”
Oh fuck. How could I forget I needed to tell this guy something? “I shit my pants last year,” I said, leaning into the mic. I could see people in the front rows crying they were laughing so hard. What was with them? People needed to know this type of stuff so they wouldn’t be embarrassed. I wanted to end the stigma. Everyone can have a bad morning after a night-long bender.
“Holy fuck…!” Even the hypnotist was laughing. What was everyone’s problem? “That sucks, Mike. Was it hard or soft?” The audience chortled anew.
“I had diarrhea,” I said matter-of-factly. End the stigma. End the shame.
“How about you, Dylan? You ever shit yourself?”
“Yes,” he muttered, staring at the floor.
“More enthusiastic with each and every response,” said the hypnotist, snapping next to his ear.
Dylan looked up, a big stupid grin blossoming across his face. “Yes!”
“Did you tell anyone?”
“Yes!”
“Did you yell it from the rooftops?”
“YES!”
The audience was dying. Dylan blushed and looked down, humiliated, as he seemed to regain control of his emotions.
“And have you ever fucked Josh’s grandmother?” the hypnotist asked.
“Yes!” Dylan beamed, immediately turning bright again.
“What the fuck?!” yelled Josh to my right, startling me.
“Easy, Josh. That’s her private business.”
I quickly turned to grab the microphone, but the hypnotist was already holding it toward me, almost like he was expecting me to talk. I couldn’t believe I’d forgotten to tell him this!
“When she gave me a blowjob, my last girlfriend liked to play with my butthole,” I said.
“Ew, man, gross,” Josh groaned.
“Now Josh, don’t be so judgmental about Mike’s private life.”
He turned the microphone back toward me.
“I beat off about Hector’s sister,” I blurted, surprising even myself. I had been holding that in a long time, though, so it felt good to share.
“Niiiiice, man…” cooed the hypnotist, placing a hand on my shoulder. “Is she hot?”
“Oh yeah…” I nodded, grinning at the memory.
“She look like him?”
“I guess…” I said, thinking about it a bit.
He smiled wryly for a moment, looking down at me. I looked back up at him. What? What did he want?
Gently, he lifted the hand on my shoulder and pressed a single finger to my temple, whispering, “Sleeeeep…” For some reason, I closed my eyes and relaxed back into my chair, but only for a moment. Just a second later, he was saying “Wide awake” and patting me on the shoulder, and I opened my eyes, blinking and raising my head.
Directly in front of me, to my (pretty delighted) surprise, kneeling on all fours, was Hector’s sister, Maria. For some reason, she was dressed in leggings and a puffy skirt that looked like a tutu. She was topless, and her breasts—smaller than I remembered—were an absolutely luscious shade of tan. Somehow, I knew we’d been talking all night and she wanted me to fuck her, so I immediately got off my chair and kneeled behind her, dick already starting to get hard.
“Oh fuck, he’s really getting hard,” I heard someone say, in the back of my mind, and I could hear a sound almost like muffled laughter, but I didn’t really think about it. I assumed we were still at a party or something—wherever we’d been talking. Someone must be watching TV in another room.
“There’s already a hole in the back of her leggings, Mike. Just stick it in,” I heard someone say, or maybe myself think, I wasn’t sure. Somehow, I just knew that was right. That’s what love was… just knowing what was right in the moment.
I grabbed Maria’s waist and climbed between her spread legs, pressing my pelvis up against her. My hard cock felt like it was touching fabric, sliding up the crack of her ass, but I knew it was actually inside her. There was a hole in her leggings. Of course it was inside her.
I began to pump gently, grinding into her and moaning. She moaned too, throwing her head back and pressing back harder onto my cock.
“Play with her tits, Mike. Smell her, taste her. Run your fingers through her hair,” a voice in the back of my head told me.
I slid my hands up her torso, over her surprisingly firm set of abs (did she work out? she was almost as ripped as Hector!) and up to her surprisingly tight breasts. God, they felt like heaven. I had fantasized about these so many times. I couldn’t believe I was holding them now.
I leaned forward, resting my chest against her broad, tan—and again, surprisingly muscular—back, hoping she was strong enough to hold me. Her flesh felt smooth and warm as it rippled, inviting.
I pressed my nose to the nape of her neck, smelling her. She had a faint scent that reminded me of Hector’s cologne—I wondered if she’d found a sister fragrance—and I ran my right hand through her hair, which was shorter and stiffer than I remembered—I seemed to recall a raven-black waterfall the last time we’d met. I guess she’d gotten it cut.
“Hot fucking stuff, huh, Josh?” I heard someone mutter.
“I’d rather watch… National Geographic,” I heard someone grunt, followed by more laughter. Damn thin walls around here. Maria and I would have to be extra quiet.
“And you’re enjoying this too, aren’t you?” I heard the first voice say.
“Yes!” came someone’s excited reply.
“Kinda wish you were Hector, don’t you?”
“Yes!”
Hector? What was Hector doing? I’d have to find out from him later—while being discrete about my own whereabouts, of course. Right now, I wouldn’t wanna be anyone but me.
“Or maybe even Josh?”
“Yesssss!”
“Sleep.”
I stopped paying attention at this point. Who fucking cared what was going on in the hall when I had this beautiful woman right in front of me?
“That’s it, Dylan. You can play with yourself like a little pervert too. And as a matter of fact—sleeeeeep,” I hear another soft snap, sounding like it was a million miles away. God, what the fuck was happening in that other room?
“As a matter of fact, Dylan and Josh, I actually just switched both you guys’ junk, so if you wanna actually jerk yourself, you’re gonna need to reach between the other guy’s legs on the count of one, two, three…” Snap.
I heard a chorus of laughter and applause ripple in from the other room—Jesus, that must be some program on TV. Didn’t matter. I was so close to climaxing. Fuck, I was slamming in and out of Maria’s hot pussy, and it felt better than anything I’d ever felt in my life. I was going to blow a huge load inside my best friend’s hot-ass sister. What more could I possibly ask for?
“That’s it, Mikey, you’re doing so good! Now all four of you up onstage, getting ready to bust that load, at the count of three now. One, feel that passion rising…”
Oh god, yes, I could feel it. I had no idea where that voice was coming from, but it was so so right. I tilted by head back, concentrating only on thrusting like a porn star. This was it. I was gonna show Maria how much of a man I was.
“Two, balls churning with that cum—or vagina, as the case may be.”
Fuck yes. I was so close. I was panting, sweating, gasping for air. My hands gripped Maria’s tight tits for dear life. I was going to remember this moment forever! What a gorgeous, gorgeous goddess.
“Two-and-a-half…”
God fucking damn it. Why couldn’t I come? I was so ready. So ready. I just needed my brain to get there. Just needed it to say that last little five letter word and in a single instant I was ready to-
“Sleep.”