THE WALK HOME
Chapter 2
Wednesday went well, despite a slow and creaky start. A hot shower had taken care of the aches from the awkward sleeping pose, and a pair of grilled cheese sandwiches for a noon-hour breakfast finished the revival process. As I went through my daily routine, I spared a thought or two for Jess, but mostly I just had an ordinary day. Lunch, light reading, check my social media, take care of my daily needs, then head to work.
And work was pretty good, too. Pretty normal, a little slow, but well within ordinary expectations, which meant that when I got on the last bus heading close to home, I was only a little exhausted. Still, the longer the bus ride took, the closer I got to my stop, the more I was thinking about Jessica and her silhouette in the window, and my mental picture of her based on that brief moment we shared.
There was never a doubt that she would be there. Normally I would have questioned, or at least protected myself against disappointment, but I simply didn’t have any fear that Jess wouldn’t show.
There was maybe a little spring in my step that I wasn’t used to having. If I was the sort to whistle or hum, I probably would have been whistling or humming. Still there was a little drumbeat in my mind as I moved down the street, motivating my walking pace.
“You’re early.” Jess’ voice floated down to me as I walked up to her window. Of the two columns of three little sunrooms jutting out towards the sidewalk, hers was the only one with a light in it—not really surprising, given the hour.
“I didn’t know I was on a schedule,” I answered, leaning against the wall at a right angle to the window, my eyes at roughly her stomach level.
“Yesterday you were five minutes later than today.”
I shrugged. “There was almost no traffic. And I’ve had a good day, so maybe I’m moving a little faster.”
“Traffic was bad yesterday?”
“Work was bad yesterday,” I explained. “I was moving slow.“
And then there was the shadow at the window. “And today you’re moving fast.”
“And tomorrow I might be slow again.”
“Well,” Jess said in a matter-of-fact manner, “You’ll just have to work harder to meet my schedule.” Then she laughed, and I laughed. There was a little pause. “You have a nice laugh,” Jess continued.
“Funny, I was thinking the same about you,” I replied with a smile. “I remembered it from last night.”
Jess giggled and my smile got wider. “I like being remembered. Being alone so much I can start to feel like I’m forgotten.”
I looked up around where her eyes would be and asked, “Don’t you have anyone who looks in on you?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah, my parents come by three times a week to drop off groceries, and my neighbours are pretty awesome.”
Suddenly nervous, I looked around. “Neighbours?”
Jess laughed again. “There’s two units on each floor. The only other permanent resident is on the third floor opposite me, and she’s deaf as a post, and I’m not being metaphorical, she’s actually deaf, I’ve had to learn some simple sign language to talk to her.” The silhouette of her hands and arms danced as she talked, and I wondered if (and I imagined that) she was signing at me.
“The couple across the way only rarely stay overnight except in the winter,” she continued. “If they’re here it’s during the daytime. They have a place out of town they live at until it gets too cold. My parents rented the apartment above me, just in case they want to stay close, which is pretty rare. Upper unit on this side is a sex den for a rich stockbroker who doesn’t want his wife to know about his girlfriends, so he’s out of here and home by ten.” I blushed at that. “And the middle floor opposite is, believe it or not, vacant. Don’t know why. Maybe it’s haunted.”
I shrugged. “If it’s cheaper than my place, maybe I should move. It’s ten minutes closer to the bus.”
“It’s not cheap.” Jess quoted me a number, and no, it wasn’t cheap—about 50% more than a month than of one of the expensive units in my building, and I was in one of the bachelors, not the doubles. No doubt seeing my expression, she explained, “Old building, modernized. Solid and well-kept. Giant units, biggest 2-bed we saw on the market. Central air, high-speed internet, cable, all included. Location’s good, not that I get to go out in it.”
“Sounds really nice, and completely unaffordable.” I wondered just how she could pay for it. I had to drag myself to work five days a week, stock shelves and handle customers (and co-workers) just to keep from being evicted.
“Yeah probably.” Jess sounded a little dismissive and uncomfortable, like she didn’t want to talk about it. Unexpectedly, at least to me, the subject pivoted. “So did you have a good sleep in your nice, warm bed?”
I nodded, strangely baffled. I found it hard to think about money, all of a sudden. “I wound up just collapsing into it,” I said, hearing my own voice sounding a little slow, a little soft. “I didn’t even curl up properly. Woke up with my legs bent over the side.”
For some reason, Jess laughed and clapped for joy like she had the night before. “That’s just wonderful, Priya!”
I felt my mouth curl into a smile at her infectious happiness; I was feeling cheerful, but confused. “It is? Why would you care about my sleeping habits?”
“I’m stuck in this apartment. I have nothing to do but dream.” I heard that smile on her face again, or maybe I was just hearing it more now than when we were talking about harder things. “Dreams are so important to me.”
I shifted a bit against the wall. How long had I been standing there? “Don’t know that I had any dreams.”
“Dreams and fantasies mean a lot, Priya, especially when that’s all you’ve got.” Her tone reminded me of a teacher explaining to an interested student.
“Yeah,” I said with a nod, feeling a little heavy and tired. “That makes sense.” I supposed that even a good work shift could take a lot out of me. “What should I do about it, then, if I don’t have dreams?”
“Make some up!” She exclaimed, laughing.
I was confused again. “Make up... a dream?”
“Uh huh.” I may have just imagined a bob of her head. “Think of me as a kid asking for a bedtime story, except it’s your bedtime and I’m the one just getting up.”
I blinked. “My bedtime?” It was late, sure, but...
“Oh, sorry, I guess it’s not quite time for you to flop into your nice, warm bed, but that doesn’t mean you can’t dream.”
She was right. “You’re right,” I said, leaning a little more heavily against the wall.
“So you can tell me what kind of dream you had last night. Even if it wasn’t a real dream.”
I could. “I can,” I nodded.
“It’ll be fun to make something up together like that.”
I smiled and nodded again. That did sound like fun. “That does sound like fun.”
“Okay, so let me start... hmm...”
I waited a moment while Jess thought things through, and stretched out my fingers. They were feeling a little strange. It was almost like I could sense the blood moving through them.
Jess took her time before starting. “So you were lying on your bed, relaxing, and your eyes started to close.”
I realized I was looking at my hands. I shook my head to clear a bit of the fluff. “Uh huh, I had already taken off my sari and—”
“Whoa!” Jess laughed. “I don’t need all the personal details, Pree!”
Pree. No one had called me that since grade school. I laughed along with her, blushing furiously, feeling the blood in my face like I had been feeling it in my fingers.. “Uh... okay, s-so... I was lying on the bed, and my eyes were heavy and starting to close.” I could feel my pulse pounding in my head. The rhythm of it was soothing.
“Right, and then the first thing you saw when you started to dream was...”
I waited. She waited.
“Was...?” Jess prompted me.
“Oh! Right, I’m supposed to be making something up.” I stammered, trying to think of anything at all and just drawing a blank. Hadn’t we been talking about work and money and rent just a moment ago?
Jessica laughed again, and the sound made me feel more at ease. Something about it made me feel like the joke wasn’t all at my expense, but that she was the target of her own laughter as well. “Okay, okay, Pree, I can help with that.”
“You can help? What do you mean?”
“I mean I know a way that you can get a picture in your head. Just lean there. Or maybe sit down, you might be more comfortable. But there, where I can see you this time, not like last night.”
A little thrown by all the directions and the situation, I gathered my sari up and sat down on the ground again, this time facing alongside the window instead of sitting under it.
“Great. Now just close your eyes,” she continued, and I did. “Just like last night, in your nice, warm bed. You had a dream last night, no, don’t say anything, we’re just making this up as we go along, you had a dream. Agree with me.”
Agree with me, she said. Okay, I could do that. “Alright, I had a dream last night.” That wasn’t difficult at all.
“Dreams are often weird,” she kept going almost like I didn’t say anything, “so sometimes they don’t make a lot of sense, and things that seem normal in dreams that would be very strange in real life. So when your eyes closed, and you took that first deep, sleepy breath, you saw...”
I took that nice deep breath to try to ‘remind’ myself what I had seen last night. “I saw... a long river.” I worked to picture it in my mind. “A brilliant, blue, fast-moving, shallow river, in the middle of a wide open plain.”
“A few trees dotting the landscape,” Jess added, and I nodded. “An eagle flying overhead.”
“Uh huh. Nice big shady trees, sitting next to the river. Lots of water for them. Nothing getting in their way.”
“And you’re sitting under one of these shady trees...”
I could imagine rough bark behind my back instead of hard brick. “Just sitting, watching the river. Out of the sun. It’s a hot day. I’m supposed to be bringing water back from the river, but I’m taking a break after the long walk.”
“You must be tired.” Jess’ voice was smiling again. “You must be very tired, if you’re dreaming about resting.”
I only really noticed that I had paused when I spoke again. “Yes, but in the dream, someone can meet me there by the river.” I let my eyes open so I didn’t fall asleep. I had a nice, warm bed to relax in at home, after all.
“Who’s going to meet you there? Describe her.”
“I don’t know her,” I decided. “But she’s tall, and thin, and pale. Long black hair down to her hips flowing loose. Blue eyes. Sharp and intelligent. Hawk-like eyes. And nose. Angular face, angular body.”
“And when she approaches you?’
I was really getting into it. “She starts to talk. Her voice is soft. She has a beautiful smile that makes her whole face glow and shows right through in her words.”
Jess giggled. “You’re really good at this, when you let go a little.”
I let my eyes close and superimposed the woman in my dreams onto the shadowy figure above. “Thanks, Jess.”
“Don’t mention it, Pree. What does she say, when she talks?”
I thought for a moment, and the idea that popped into my head made me chuckle. “She says, ‘Let’s go on an adventure.’”
“And because it’s a dream, you just leave everything behind and go.”
With all this talk of dreams, I was starting to nod off. My energy from the good shift had dissipated entirely. “And if I don’t go now, I’m going to fall asleep right here.” I got to my feet and stretched up tall, and just about every joint in my body popped.
“Hey hold on a moment,” Jess said. “Can you give me your number, just in case? I don’t want you to be standing around waiting if I’m not at home.”
“Huh?” I looked up again. “Aren’t you usually at home at two in the morning?”
“Sometimes I might be somewhere else. Or maybe too tired. Or... I dunno.” The shadow shrugged. “Maybe I find a cutie in another clean room and stay over.”
I know I didn’t see it, but I’m sure I didn’t imagine the wink. I grinned. Jess was so much fun to talk to. “Yeah, alright, I don’t really want to stand around waiting for you for an hour or something.”
That beautiful laughter filled the air. “You’d wait an hour? Jeez, I was just thinking of you wasting five minutes.”
I laughed along with her again and gave her my number before wishing her a good night. That same spring in my step had returned, despite my momentary fear of falling asleep. I practically leapt up the front steps and jogged up the stairs to my little apartment. I took off my clothes just as I had the night before, sitting on the side of my bed in just my panties, when my phone made a noise. I received a text and didn’t recognize the number, but the message told me everything I needed to know.
- — unknown number:
lets go on an adventure!
I saved the number and texted back a quick reply—Tomorrow night!—and settled back on the pillows, lying on top of the covers. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath when the phone blipped at me again.
- — Jess:
looking forward to it!!! :D
- — Priya:
Me too!
I put the phone down and, more exhausted than I felt, I couldn’t help but picture the eyes of a hawk, brilliant and blue, staring into mine from the darkness.
* * *