WHEN GOOD THERAPY GOES BAD
By Hypno Witch Shiri
That’s me, sitting down in my office as I listen to the secretary walk out from the front waiting room, leaving for the day. I am a psychologist, and have just finished a full day of listening to everyone else’s problems.
My first was a person who actually brought a list of everything wrong with her psychologically. She has some thirty items of problems and I felt like telling her to just simply end it all; thirty problems and most people can get over just one problem, she will never make it. I took her list and slowly ripped it in half and told her she had one problem only, a lack of self-esteem that was getting in the way of her bettering herself. It is always easy to find what is wrong with you and make it into more than it has to be. Armed with a box of tissue I held it up knowing the tears would come and instead of taking just one she grabbed the box. After the session she stole the box, but it okay, I get them in bulk.
The day continued on, depression, anxiety all the way to nightmares and now it’s over, finally over and I get to think about just me and me only and I have been waiting for this all day.
Did you see how fast I jumped out of my chair? My secretary left the front door open and now here is a man standing in my doorway. He is handsome, but one can never be sure about someone.
“Dr. McCabe?” He said as I recognized him as a patient of mine.
“Timmy, right?” I asked, noticing the worry on his face.
“So you do know me?” he said.
This question could mean anything, it gives me no indication of what he wants or is here for, and so far I am a little scared but not too much.
“Of course I know you,” I answered. “I saw you last week and yesterday, treating you for depression.”
“Doctor, you have to help me, I don’t know where to turn,” He said.
“Is it something that can wait until tomorrow, It’s time for me to go home,” I answered.
“I really have to talk to someone now.”
“Are you going to hurt yourself?”
“I don’t know.”
“Come in and close the door, let’s talk,” I said. " Tell me what’s wrong.”
There I am again, I should have never done it, now I am trapped in a room alone in my office with someone who is not well.
“I feel like no body cares about me, that I am a nothing.”
“You feel that way, but do you think it is true, do you think, not feel, but think you’re a nothing?”
“No, just feel, I guess,” he said.
“My suggestion to you is that you go home, no charge tonight, these things happen and in the morning come in a 8 AM I have a cancellation and we can talk then.”
See how big my eyes got, do you know why? He is pointing a gun at me now.
“I want to talk now!” He yelled. “Everyone wants to put me off, not deal with me.”
Yes. Good Samaritan me, I just had to help one more person, been waiting all day for this.
“Okay, I will talk with you Timmy, but you have to point the gun somewhere else, I can’t think with you pointing that gun at me.”
“You don’t even care about me, everyone else it more important.”
“That’s not true Timmy,” I said. “Here is your file on my desk. I take home six or eight files a night and go though them, these are the ones I care about most Timmy.”
That’s what I look like when I lie, the files on my desk is just me and my poor record keeping and lack of a good secretary.
“I can get your file, we can talk about just you.”
That’s Timmy, punching the back of his head. He is getting worse and I know it.
“What did you hope to accomplish by bringing that gun Timmy?”
“I want you to listen to me.”
“Then tell me, Timmy what do you want to say.”
“It wouldn’t matter, " He said. “The only reason you want to listen to me is because I have a gun.”
“Now that’s not true, I’ll listen even if you didn’t have a gun.”
“You didn’t even notice me at the bank.”
Oh shit, he’s is a suicidal depressive and he is infatuated with me. Chances are he is going to kill himself to make me feel bad.
“Listen to me Timmy, are you taking your medication like I asked you to,” I said. “Right now you’re feeling very confused and making bad decisions, the meds help clear things up.”
“Yeah, I’m taking them, but I don’t think there helping.”
This would be the jackass statement of the year.
“Obviously not, but we can try something else.”
“So you can get rid of me, right?” He said. “You just want me out of your life.”
I know now that I am going to have to confuse him, change his mind about things, and make him focus on something else other than that gun.
“Timmy? Are you here to rape me?”
“No, why would you say that?”
“There has to be more than one reason why you brought that gun. You want to rape me, make me be someone who is on your level instead of someone out of your league.”
“Shut-up! I’m not a rapist!”
“Are you sure, because it might be an opportunity that’s worth it.”
“I want to talk about me.” He yelled pointing the gun back at me.
That’s me realizing I could that this has nothing to do with control.
“Okay, let me dim the lights, just a little, is that okay?”
“That’s fine.”
“I’ll sit here and you can stay on the couch chair and let’s have a good real talk, just you and me, no file at all.”
He still has his gun pointing at me, in my chair I have a gun between the cushions, but I will never get to it before he pulls the trigger on me.
“Now I want you to tell me what is wrong.”
“I’m too nervous, I can’t think straight.”
“I have a way of helping you to relax, just take a deep breath and let it out slowly.”
He’s letting out a breath, I have doing things for me now.
“Just look into my eyes and listen to the calming sound of my voice. So how nice my eyes are, deep brown eyes, soft voice, so easy to listen to and allow your whole body to relax.”
“I feel better.” Timmy said.
“Timmy, I have this very nice crystal in a small box, it helps people to feel much more calm than....”
“You’re trying to hypnotize me!”
“What is your fucking problem Timmy?” I yelled. " You have a gun on me, you wont listen to me, I am talking to you and you’re not going to cooperate are you?”
“You’re trying to do that shrink stuff to me.”
“No shit Timmy, I am psychologist, it is what I do to help people, but you don’t want my help do you?” I said. “You want me to give you a reason.”
I’m mad and I don’t care now if he pulls the trigger.
“Do it Timmy, pull the trigger.”
“Maybe that’s what I’ll do!”
“Yeah, I see what is wrong with you. I’m pretty and one of the in people. Have my own office and drive a BMW. What are you, a nothing, you want to be happy like me and want feel loved like everyone gives me. My billboards are all over town, my posters on busses saying to come see me to help with your problems. Everyone knows me, and you’re just a little person. Is that it Timmy?”
“Shut-up!”
“That is it Timmy isn’t it?” I said. “No matter what I do, I always come out on top. Beautiful, successful and you want to be a part of my life, but you don’t measure up. You don’t even come close to being someone as great as me.”
That’s Timmy, his eyes full of tears. He is jealous, infatuated and obsessed and I am driving him over the edge.
“What’s the matter Timmy, cat got your tongue? There are two types of people, the special people who have wonderful lives and are so secure and then people like you, who are not secure and are so jealous. People like me exploit people like you, play on your problems as we take your money. Then we go home to our glass homes with marble tile and floors and my boyfriend meets me, he drives a Porsche. We have sex all night long and you, you’re a nobody I would never let into my home, you’re only good for one hour....”
“I’m going to do it!” Timmy said pointing the gun at me.
“That’s it Timmy, but once again, you’re a fool. Everyone will mourn my death for years, I will become more special than ever and no one will ever care about you.”
“Stop it!”
“Look into my eyes Timmy, we can do this together, take the gun, put it to your head, make me sorry for being me, punish me good Timmy do it.”
That’s Timmy raising the gun to head, slightly hypnotized and extremely confused.
“Look deeper into my eyes Timmy, I want you to understand that someone like me, could never love someone like you. Now do it Timmy, show me how much you can’t take it coward, show me what I am doing to you make me pay!”
CLICK!!!
“What’s the matter Timmy, forgot the bullets?”
Timmy looked around the gun, “I loaded it, I remember loading it!”
“No Timmy, I had you make sure you unloaded it.”
That’s Timmy with a dazed confused look on his face.
“In my last session with you, I had you hypnotized and gave you a suggestion to make sure you unloaded the gun.”
“But I...”
“That’s right, you’re so pathetic, you could get over a simple suggestion to load your gun, you always have been and always will be my failure.”
Those are tears in Timmy’s eyes, right where I want them to be.
“Fall to your knees, now who am, we worked on this last week.”
“My, my, Mistress,” He answered.
“That’s right and I control everything you do. It is why you are here now and why you’re on your knees before me.” I answered. “Place your head in my lap and cry like the worthless baby who can’t accomplish anything without me.”
So there I am, one of my patients on his third visit. He thought he was so special, famous with a big multi million-dollar glass home with indoor and outdoor pool. Drives a Porsche on the fist visit, a BMW on the second and me, I can’t even get an office with plumbing that works. He has it all and needs psychological help, what a waste. Soon I will be able to push his wife out of his life and all that is his will be mine. He will go home tonight after pleasing me and he will remember nothing, but day by day he will slowly come to the conclusion that he now belongs to me.
I told you, I had waited all day for this.