Ass You Wish : Building Our Own Families — Ch. 06
Azuryn may have been the first to dance with the fires of anxiety that night, but the torch had been passed and it was now Ophelia’s turn to tango the twin flame; she followed along, as she often did best. In that split second of spilt thought, Ophelia’s long buried self-image of awkwardness had been dug up and possessed by her anxiety; crashing through the roof like a glass elevator.
If getting lost in the clouds meant being embarrassed, then she’d skyrocketed straight to the stratosphere; anymore and she’d start seeing stars. Blown sky high in the blink of an eye, her embarrassment wasn’t alone though. Her flung hands had hit her face so fast to that it felt like she could’ve knocked herself clean off her feet. And a big part of her probably would’ve preferred that. At least then she would’ve been brought back down to the ground where she needed to be; her proper place. She was absolutely floored with herself.
All the while, Azuryn understandably had no clue what was going on. ‘Like, seriously, what the hell is going on?’ Azuryn thought as they began their mental monologue. They’d opened their mouth, as if the right words would magically appear, but then quickly shut it; not wanting to nettle her self-chagrined state. ‘Look, I don’t expect you to just let me back into your life, let alone your heart, but please... I need more than these mixed signals. No matter what happens, I just want us to be honest with ourselves and each other. You’d always tell me I deserved better, and I’d always retort with “then be the better I deserve”; so now, let’s be the better WE deserve! Because whether it’s joint or singular, I think that’s the least we deserve.’ Stepping forward despite the fact that they had no clue how to tell her everything, they still attempted to get closer to her. They moved cautiously without taking their eyes off of her, continuing to try and read her body language.
Statuesque, she stood there like an angel. Although she knew weeping wouldn’t solve anything, her palms were still placed to cover her face; her racing thoughts then landed upon them. If it’d been Azuryn’s hands that’d smacked squarely against her stubbornly adorable face, she wouldn’t be feeling so awkward. She’d be feeling a lot of things; awkward, though? The very thought wouldn’t even be allowed; any thoughts, for that matter. The ensuing thought made her chuckle and titter into her hands; and continue dripping down into her black lace panties, growing a little hazier with every succeeding drop.
No matter how muffled or quiet it’d been, with that being the only sound in the hush of night, it easily caught Azuryn’s attention and became the most recent addition to their continual confusion. Slowly, they reached their hand out to her shoulder.
“Ophelia... ” They said in their calmest voice. “What’re you thinking?”
Forcing her hands from her face, she unintentionally pushed Azuryn off; her hands fell into tight fists as she stepped back.
“What am I thinking? What am I thinking!?” The sunset in her eyes shifted violently, and now looked like a raging forest fire. Seeing this, there was a moment of fear in Azuryn; but it was soon engulfed by a hesitant wave of excitement. The embers of her anxiety’s crash site were sparked, triggered by the question, and flames were beginning to burst forth. It made them unsure of which tension was heating up fastest; all they could do at this point was trust her to trust them. In a way, she had all the power; after all, it relied upon her consent for them to take charge like they both wanted.
At some point around this time, somewhere deep within the recesses of both their unconscious minds, a question had begun to ring out that neither could yet hear, but both could feel the beatings as it echoed. Steadily, with each misstep and every misfire, they could feel it growing; but for the time being, all they could make out was the sound of drums. If they could just be honest with each other and ask the right questions, then the silence in their hearts would surely fall. Would she allow herself to become an enraged stranger, or a Goddess roped down by the chains of a Master?