The Erotic Mind-Control Story Archive

Veronica stared straight ahead. There was someone sitting across, and she couldn’t quite recognize her. The woman in front was kneeling on a matt, staring straight ahead. There were other people next to the woman, a row of women to one side, a row of women to the other side, all kneeling close together. She was oddly aware of the stranger in front of her; maybe staring was having an effect on her, but Veronica could feel the woman’s knees on the soft matt. She could hear a slow hum in the room also, but not too loud. Veronica had to strain hard to even notice it, and as soon as she did she came back to the quiet nothingness; the echo chamber of her own thoughts.

So Veronica stared straight ahead.

In the reflection there was another woman moving behind the rows and rows of kneeling women. She was wearing a leotard, and nothing else. Her body was strong, lean, a well oiled machine. Something about the way she moved, like a petal in the wind, made Veronica feel like prey. Silent, weightless, completely controlled, the woman in the leotard exuded a captivating aura. It was the look of someone who would deflect a blow to the chest, bending backwards with control and speed, and kick the assailant on the face as she did a backwards walkover.

Trainedform, Veronica a voice in the emptiness of her own mind reminded her. Something about that word made everything but her less important. So Veronica breathed and waited and stared ahead. She needed to wait for something special. Breath in, filling with the energy of the room, breathe out, and give it to someone else to enjoy.

Veronica stared ahead as the Trainedform moved behind someone and kneeled. Veronica could see the muscles of her deltoids, of her arms and her chest, small shadows cast by white light. Something about the woman’s strong body... Veronica would’ve shivered, but the thought never manifested; as if any thought but what the Trainedform was denied to her. Just breathed in, and wait. Breathe out, and share.

Instead, Veronica stared at the woman across. She was taller than the others, and her fiery red hair was tied in a tight mass at the back of her head. She could feel the weight of that mass bob with every breath, Veronica realised; she nodded, and weight bobbed on her crown. It looked perfect on the woman across. It was a perfect look. Veronica felt a shivering nothingness on her neck. If that look was so perfect, then, why did Veronica’s neck feel so bare and empty? Lonely. Veronica felt the energy of the room, materialized words vibrating in the air. There was a low tingling sensation, she realised, like a melodious hum, but on her skin. Straight ahead, she stared, at the girl in the bright purple outfit and the red hair. Veronica breathed in, and felt that wonderful tightness that her Trainer had told her about. On her arms and legs, Veronica felt... felt wonderful.

The Trainedform was kneeling behind the woman directly to the left of the woman sitting across from Veronica. Something had happened to the other women in the row, for they weren’t there anymore. The ones that remained sat with chests pushed forwards, straining material strong and tight and so very delicious in colours infinite. Veronica was curious, but she couldn’t turn her head, just stare ahead and breathe in and breathe out and join in with the group energy. Her knees hurt; she realised, but ignored it. If only her reflection would move for a second, she could relieve the pressure. A silent gasp escaped her throat. Yes, that was her. She breathed in, and for a moment she managed to escape the echo chamber of her own mind. For a moment she saw the changes begun after just one tai chi session; saw what would change in the future, based on this very primal change. She kept breathing in, feeling her ample bosom stretch the fabric of her leotard as it grew tighter still, thicker still, nearly invading her body. That she would never wear something like that didn’t come to mind. Veronica was at peace with the energies. She breathed out, bouncing back into the prison of her own mind. She was that much closer of her best self.

Suddenly Veronica tensed. She felt warm and caring fingers caress her neck. Finally, something to cover that bad bareness! Veronica stared straight ahead as she felt warm body pressed against her bare back. Veronica felt energy from that spot spread like wildfire on her skin, under her outfit. She breathed in, and felt it travel deep within her, deep into her echo chamber. Everything has energy, and you can guide it, Veronica heard a distant voice. Yes, direct it. Veronica breathed, and the energy travelled directly there; where, she didn’t know, but something told her she would soon know.

“You’ve been really good today, Veronica,” Trainedform Agnieszka said. Veronica felt warm all over the place. “It has felt really good hasn’t it?”

The whisper caressed Veronica’s skin in a way that brought memories long buried, long yearned for.

“Yes...” Veronica couldn’t even hear her own voice, couldn’t even feel her own lips parting ever so slightly. But she could see them in the reflection ahead. Her face was turning the colour of her hair, and her lips could not be closed.

Veronica felt a pair of breasts pressing tight against her bare back, pressing through what she knew as a checkerboard pattern of black and white. In the reflection she saw the Trainedform behind her, saw her face so close to her ear, felt her breath on her skin. But Veronica’s mind was los elsewhere in the realm that the pattern engraved deeply in her mind had created. To follow the meanings hiding in the pattern was imperative, it was everything Veronica wanted; for the pattern told her how she would be trained, and that was everything Veronica yearned for. Veronica wanted to be her best self. Following her trainer was a beautiful thing, Veronica understood. Knew. Needed. All over, Veronica felt energy. And it was so good.

“Good. Good is the first step to being better, so much better. And you will understand everything.” Trainedform Agnieszka said.

Veronica felt a kiss on her neck, in that space just under the ear. She shivered, hands holding her tight on the shoulders, fingers felt through a thick fabric not unlike that of a fancy wetsuit. Trainedform pressed her breasts against Veronica’s bare back again, spreading heat where there was want. Kisses, moving from one side of her neck to the other. Fingers trailing down her covered shoulders, down the naked spot between her shoulder blades, down her spine. Her fingers went under Veronica’s outfit, softly caressing. And all along Trainedform whispered things Veronica couldn’t quite catch with her ears, but her mind, engraved with the patterns, could read it easily.

The moment extended for eternity, a small, endless time.

“Do you want become a Member, Veronica?”

Veronica simply nodded.

“Then you will meet Sorensenze.”

“Sorensenze wants what is best for me...” Veronica whispered, so softly.

Ceremoniously, Trainedform Agnieszka lifted an object over Veronica’s head. Veronica simply stared ahead, breathing, with a strange clarity. For a moment she was able to see the whole picture: the row of women staring mindlessly to her side, the mask suspended like a cultural relic on top of her head, and her own body encased in shades of purple perfection. Her new uniform pulsated as if alive, or, maybe, it was just her body underneath. The purple leotard was high-cut, long-sleeved, and high-necked; it had textured lines of a darker colour following every contour of her body, up and down, down and up, flowing until you found her legs. Her legs were covered in a lighter purple, shinier, as if glossy nylon but thicker, a lot thicker. The patterns on her legs, all the way to her covered, toeless feet, spoke simpler stories than what Trainedform Agnieszka’s leotard could tell. For a small eternity, Veronica felt the snug uniform everywhere. And it was heaven.

“That she does,” Trainedform Agnieszka said, her voice breaking with emotion.

The visor lowered. For a fraction of a moment she saw it in all its wrong glory—like a mask, with a pair of black goggles, with thick lenses, and a ring object like a gasmask canister right above the goggles—and slowly saw it being placed over her face. It felt tight on the forehead, if soft, and around her cheekbones and over her nose. The world went dark. Sound was drowned, as her ears were swallowed by the mask.

In the dark silence of her own echo chamber, Veronica felt fingers pull the zipper of her outfit, slowly closing. Up and up and up the outfit tightened, as her breathing increased, as energy filled her mind, she could feel the mask coming alive. Blackness was gone, replaced by a bedazzling pattern that Veronica was starting to learn to read, like a lawyer understood a contract, like a prophet understood holy script, like a lunatic understood art.

Suddenly she felt the bite of the zipper under her neck, where Trainedform had kissed her, felt her outfit wrap snugly around it, dissipating that feeling of lack from before. She was trapped in her uniform, and it made her smile; everywhere it took hold of her mind, like a prison takes hold of a convict’s sense of self. Veronica knew then that she would never be able to go far without the uniform biting in places where it was too tight to ever be fully comfortable.

Veronica was enclosed in her uniform.

Agnieszka moved on to the next girl in the row.

Pitch black, the room was.

“I am improving myself by following my Trainedform’s commands. Trainedforms are one with Sorensenze, and Sorensenze wants me to become my best self. By training my body, I learn the tenants of self-improvement, and I become closer to Sorensenze’s ideal. The ideal is unattainable, for perfection doesn’t exist. I must accept myself as imperfect, so I can become my best self. My body and mind are to be forever trained by Sorenzense, so that I can be a better person. The destination doesn’t matter, just that I try my hardest to become better. I obey my Trainedform, for I obey Sorensenze, for I want to be my best self.”

Collective silence fell on the group. Nana lay on the floor, hands behind her head. Her feet were planted flatly on the floor, being held tight by Stephanie. In the light, Nana could only see Stephanie. The girl’s hair was retied into a high bun, tightly held by a neon green band. The girl had her hands on Nana’s trainers, her knees to each side of Nana’s legs. Nana couldn’t move, so she followed the colourful leopard print of Stephanie’s leggings, from red to blue. The girl was wearing a red leotard, long sleeved, and very tight. Sweaty, too; Nana could smell both herself and the girl. And something else...

Something bubbled inside Nana’s chest. Her throat itched. She blinked, the light was hard to look at. Like a projected kaleidoscope of black and white Cubist nonsense. The shapes moved on Stephanie’s frame, on Nana’s own legs, but, strangely, not anywhere else. The two of them were alone in a dark, dark room. A faint memory tickled at the back of her mind, of Russian propaganda posters, before another flash of black and white geometric wobbles covered that thought with their own representative meanings. Nothing mattered but this moment.

“Again.” Stephanie said, staring down at Nana with a vacant, hungry look. Nana breathed in, feeling her own nipples hard against her yellow leotard, so tight and sweaty against her skin. Her yellow leotard.

Nana lifted her torso, bum planted on the floor, Stephanie keeping her still. They never broke eye contact as Nana began another round of sit-ups. And as she lifted, the two girls recited once more. “I am improving myself by following my Trainedform’s commands. Trainedforms are one with Sorensenze, and Sorensenze wants me to become my best self. By training my body, I learn the tenants of self-improvement, and I become closer to Sorensenze’s ideal. The ideal is unattainable, for perfection doesn’t exist. I must accept myself as imperfect, so I can become my best self. My body and mind are to be forever trained by Sorenzense, so that I can be a better person. The destination doesn’t matter, just that I try my hardest to become better. I obey my Trainedform, for I obey Sorensenze, for I want to be my best self.”

The two said in unison. Only their personal duet could the two girls hear, for the words in the patterns projected allowed nothing else. Oblivious to the murmur of other voices reciting the same mantra, word by word. The patterns danced on their bodies, black and white mixing with the colours of their uniforms, to leave only one thought in their minds: to become better. And so they chanted to one another.

Nana kept exercising, her belly aching deeply, each repetition becoming harder and harder. Her body was close to her limit, but Nana knew she could push it just a little bit, just a little harder. And the more she pushed it today, the stronger it’ll be once she recovered. So she pushed it until she reached the end of this section.

“Good girls,” Trainedform Maria’s voice came from the darkness, from everywhere, for everyone.

Nana felt a warm glow spread from her belly. She lay back on her back, breathing hard. Stephanie was lying next to her, both of them looking up into the darkness. Where was that light coming from? Did it matter?

“You’ve done so well in becoming better versions of yourself.”

Nana heard Stephanie make a sound. She made the same sound. Nana felt her face flush hotter, if that was possible. If she allowed her eyes off the light for a second, she could see heat coming off her face. That sound... Nana’s left hand twitched.

“And as a reward for finishing another day of training yourself,” Trainedform Maria continued, eliciting another sound from Stephanie. Nana lagged behind. Something twisted in the pit of her stomach.

I must... I am becoming better. But... Nana thought.

“I want you to face each other.”

Nana didn’t even realise she turned to look at Stephanie. She had a pretty face, with full lips, and a prominent nose. No... And those patterns that spoke of the truth and beauty of Sorensenze... They painted such a beautiful sight. No....

“And reward each other’s obedience.”

The patterns played. Trainedform Maria commanded. Nana had to obey the words. Stephanie’s face got closer. Nana felt her hands moving on their own, a distant memory. She felt a young hand on her hip, a foreign warmth pressing on the delicious and delicate fabric of her yellow leggings. Something squirmed under her own hand, wet and warm.

“No....” Nana whispered.

Stephanie’s lips were on hers, the patterns played endlessly in the other girl’s eyes. Nana’s hands moved as commanded. Reward for obedience. Sorensenze wanted what was best for them. “Please... stop...” Nana whispered. She made a sound. It felt good. It felt wrong. Something itched, itched everywhere. Her hand pressed against something she never wanted to touch, never again.

Stephanie’s hand found the warmth between her legs. Nana felt something shift inside her stomach, something shift in her brain.

“No!” She screamed, somehow bolting upright. Her skin itched. Air, she needed air. No, never to be touched again. Not there, not ever! “Get off of me, you fucking bitch!” She screamed once more. On wobbly legs, she began to step back. The room was dark. Stephanie receded, a placid smile on her face. She didn’t even realise Nana had moved. That made Nana’s hand begin to shake. She took another step and fell, landed on her ass. The patterns were playing, beautifully, on K’s pale face. Her cheeks were red, her mouth open in an O, her eyes looking at nothing.

“No, no, no...” Nana said, scrambling to her feet. They were wobbly, weak, but she found the energy. She stumbled forward in the dark.

“Member Nana...” She heard Maria’s voice.

Without the blinding lights she could tell things in the dark. She stumbled, and felt an arm on her shoulder. She swung, feeling flesh under her wrist. She turned without looking and ran.

She stumbled through the door.

“Nana...” K whispered in between a moan and a longer moan.

She propped herself on her elbows, feeling the tug of her unitard between her legs and down her back. Her arms began to shake a little, and she moaned. K looked down to see Jen’s kaleidoscope-covered hand lost between her legs, the other one gripping tightly somewhere. K bit her lips, shaking from somewhere deep inside. She couldn’t think.

“I obey my Trainedform, for I obey Sorensenze, for I want to be my best self.” Jen whispered in her needy, girly lips of a voice.

K stared for a nightmarishly long time, only to hear her own voice say “To be my best self.”

K was back on her back, her own hand trailing shapes on Jen’s triathlon, swimsuit top, trailing the shape of the colours both real and unreal. The two finished the phrase in unison, and K felt a soft, happy feeling spread throughout her body.

“I am improving myself by following my Trainedform’s commands. Trainedforms are one with Sorensenze, and Sorensenze wants me to become my best self.” The two continued in unison. Their bodies closer. K had one leg over the other girl’s body, feeling their warmth combined between her legs. Jen’s hands felt so good going into the legs of her unitard.

K felt a kiss on her neck. But suddenly she propped herself back on her elbows, looking towards where she thought Nana had disappeared.

“Nana...” She said, interrupting her own litany. Jen had one hand on her breast, the other playing with the logo on K’s top. She kept repeating, as she rubbed her own crotch against K’s leg.

K blinked, the patterns were there, always. The darkness was scary, here the patterns showed her sweet sights and strong truths you could build a whole life on. But Nana was there, too. K tried to stand up, when suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. K’s breath caught, and she looked up into Trainedform Maria’s eyes, into the patterns speaking so many truths. K’s mouth lolled open.

“My body and mind are to be forever trained by Sorenzense,” K found herself whispering as she looked into the confusing, beautiful patterns of Trainedform Maria’s body. “So that I can be a better person. The destination doesn’t matter, just that I try my hardest to become better. I obey my Trainedform, for I obey Sorensenze, for I want to be my best self—” She felt a finger on her lips.

“Stop.” Trainedform Maria whispered.

K stopped.

K felt a hand hold hers, and lifting her weight effortless. K stopped. She felt a hand caress the back of her hand, and then a pull. Soon she felt the difference in temperature as she was guided out of the darkness. The hallway was familiar, if a bit distressing after what she had felt inside that wonderful room.

“More...” K whispered in a small voice, turning to move back towards the room.

“Look at her, such a wonderful one,” K heard a familiar voice. Not Trainedform Maria’s voice, but another one. It didn’t matter, her trainer was back inside that room and she wanted so much to go back inside. Her legs wobbled, and she tripped.

K felt a pair of strong arms catch her. K lifted her eyes, and saw a face that made her smile.

K opened her mouth-

“Lose yourself in your mind. Repeat the mantra.” Tasha said and suddenly the hallway disappeared.

Yes, Trainedform, K thought. In her mind she saw the patterns. She saw the beauty of Sorensenze. Sorensenze loved them all, understood them, wanted what was best. K liked that. It didn’t take much to begin to understand it, it was so obvious in the patterns that she could see in her mind. I am improving myself by following my Trainedform’s commands. Trainedforms are one with Sorensenze, and Sorensenze wants me to become my best self. By training my body, I learn the tenants of self-improvement, and I become closer to Sorensenze’s ideal, K repeated in her own mind. Faraway, she could feel cold air on her skin. Faraway, she wondered where her friends were. The ideal is unattainable, for perfection doesn’t exist. I must accept myself as imperfect, so I can become my best self. My body and mind are to be forever trained by Sorenzense, so that I can be a better person. The destination doesn’t matter, just that I try my hardest to become better. I obey my Trainedform, for I obey Sorensenze, for I want to be my best self. Ka repeated. Nothing else mattered, just obeying Trainedform Maria—any and all Trainedforms. That way K could become better.

“Wake.” K heard.

The rush of blood was painful. The world rushed upwards, as her legs gave way. K collapsed, feeling a pair of hands under her armpits hold her weight. Slowly, she was let onto a soft, cushioned chair. Her breathing became shallow, soft. Her legs felt on fire, her belly burning. She was thirsty, K realised. Really, really thirsty. She blinked, looking around a room like an alien temple: flowing patterns, as Van Gogh had sculpted paintings in a coral. It looked like the lobby of this wonderful space. K smiled, she remembered that, so long ago.

K followed the patterns, moving from the walls into a single point straight ahead. There was a screen there, one that looked like it was about to be swallowed by the coral-like forms. K’s eyes locked onto that screen, her mouth open, and her whole body warm up with need.

“Sorensenze’s will is my will, " K read. “Sorensenze wants me to be better, to be happy. I will obey Sorensenze.” The patterns finally spoke in their full glory, and K simply read them. “Sorensenze’s will is my will. Sorensenze wants me to be better, to be happy. I will obey Sorensenze.” Everything was dark. Only the patterns mattered. K’s mouth moved, her voice repeated, her mind unaware. “Sorensenze’s will is my will—”

K felt a hand on her shoulder, and a voice saying “Wake.”

K took breathe in, and sat straight on the chair. Her throat hurt.

“Drink,” She heard again, and felt something in her hands. She didn’t care, she drank. She drank, slowly and heartily. It tasted nice, of orange and sugar.

For a moment she closed her eyes and enjoyed the flavour. The water helped, and K felt better. She was hungry, though, in two places at once. She liked the chair, it was comfy and nice. Not as nice as-

“How do you feel?” Asked a voice.

“I feel... good. Aching all over, but good. Tired, but...”

“Good.”

“Yes.” K said. “Really good.”

“Open your eyes and behold.”

K did as commanded and saw the screen again, the patterns coalescing into a shape, a thing like a face. K gasped, leaning forwards. There it was, the truth hiding in the patterns. But soon the patterns became a bedazzling nothingness, leaving K wanting.

“Sorensenze...” K whispered.

“Yes.” The patterns moved in tandem with the voice.

K felt someone move around her chair, a woman that walked slowly towards the screen. She wasn’t any taller than K, but her shoulders were wider, her arms bigger, and her blonde hair cut really short. She wore leggings and sleeves of black and white, the pattern that, if you knew how to read it, began to tell you the stories of Sorensenze. Like a Trainedform, the woman was clad in a uniform that covered everything but her head and her fingers. Over the patterns she wore a turquoise bodysuit, with a white weightlifter’s belt around her waist. The woman paused by the screen, head bowed. She breathed in and then turned to face K. She was older than the Trainedforms, perhaps in her fifties. K could see a six pack through the turquoise of her smooth bodysuit, and her breasts had the shape of someone who hadn’t built any fat in more than twenty years. There was a crest on her right breast, but K couldn’t see it from this distance. The woman if she owned the room, owned the whole word, with a steely face and kind eyes.

She could probably bench press K with one arm.

“We are Sorensenze.” The woman and the voice said in unison.

“Sorensenze is....” K paused for a moment and then looked closer. Yes, there it was, in the patterns on her arms and legs. They were different to the others, K noticed; older and both more and less coherent. K squinted and turned to the screen. The shapes moved, danced, told her a story. An incredulous story. “Sorensenze is... is... to be... is a program—” K stopped for a second. The patterns formed into a shape she couldn’t tell, disappeared. “Sorensenze...” The patterns moved so fast, so powerfully. Too many thoughts, too many meanings.

K looked away, her eyes hurting.

The woman made an amused sound, and the voice followed a step behind. Her facial muscles didn’t quite complete a smile. “As expected. The truth of Sorensenze is too complex for someone to simply read. But once you are amalgamated with Sorensenze, everything is so clear and easy. Isn’t that right, Trainedform Tasha?” The two voices spoke.

“Yes, Sorensenze.” Tasha appeared to stand next to K. K felt a hand under her chin pull her away from the inevitable comfort of Sorensenze to look at Tasha’s beautiful frame. Something purred inside her.

Tasha kneeled, looking into K’s eyes.

“K...” Tasha said, a normal, human voice. Full of emotion. “You’ve been taught some truths.”

“I must obey Trainedforms for Trainedform’s are Sorensenze.” K repeated the text engraved into her frontal lobe.

“Yes. Trainedforms are Sorensenze. We are what happens when Sorensenze is downloaded into our minds, and an amalgamation occurs. We are individuals, inside a whole. Sorensenze is many minds come together.”

“And just plain old me,” The woman at the front said. “Plain. Old. Me.” She spoke slowly, melancholically, engrossed in her own memories before shaking her head.

K would never equate those words with the woman standing before her. It wasn’t... right.

The screen was off now, and she found herself blinking. K tried to stand up, but found her body unresponsive.

“You’ve been pushed to your limit. You might not know it, but it has been... a while since you were last in control of your own mind.”

“How long...” K said, blinking. Suddenly: a thought. “Nana!”

K tried to stand, only to wobble, the room turning, and she was helped back onto the chair.

“Your friend is safe,” Sorensenze said. Sometimes she sounded like a woman, a kind woman, and sometimes like a detached entity, as if Internet memes had a voice... “You will see her soon. And you will be able to help her, too.”

“Help... Nana?” K said. She looked at Tasha. The woman was wearing a different uniform, one that showed her toned, lean body; a triathlon two-piece suit that covered her demurely but in a tantalizing way. Muscles were offered for all to see, but what lay underneath those tight bits of fabric were calling to her, or would be, if she could see beyond the patterns on Tasha’s breasts and crotch.

“Yes. You will be able to help Nana become her best self.” Tasha said.

K smiled. “Best self.” Warmth spread from everywhere.

“You withstood the training we give to everyone who comes to our space,” Sorensenze began, walking around K’s chair. “Impressive feat. To every person who manages that, we have an offer. Call it a career change, perhaps.”

Tasha kneeled next to K, stroking her hand.

“Sorensenze was downloaded into my mind, K,” Tasha said, softly. “We became one. After two years of training here, I finally became one with Sorensenze. I now help Members become their best selves through what Sorensenze has learned over decades of exercise fads and cultures. Not everyone must live in abjection to their own potential.”

“Best self...” K whispered.

“All Trainedforms are an amalgamation of Sorensenze and empathic, beautiful people who have so much to give to others.”

“Like you, K,” Sorensenze said, standing behind K.

K looked up, to see Sorensenze holding something in her hands.

“You are to become a new Trainedform.”

“I....” K shook her head, trying to stand up. “I don’t—”

“Yes you do. You’ve felt it.” Tasha’s hands were on K’s thighs. Her body propped forward. K looked at Tasha, looked at her breasts trapped in her tight uniform, so snugly encased and at the same time wanting to be free. Saw the patterns on her outfit for what they were, the truth, the programming of Sorensenze itself made into art. And it felt so good.

“I... no. I don’t want to stop being me—”

“You won’t, K. You will still be you. But you will be able to understand! I know it isn’t much, you’ve only been here one day,” Tasha said, her forehead touched K’s, her voice warm, her fingers loving. The pause was long, charged. “But you know why you came here, right?”

“Because... I was curious.”

Sorensenze face took a motherly look, caring, if imperious in her experience. She crouched to meet K in the eyes, a hand, wrinkled and calloused, resting on the younger girl’s knee. “But why did you become curious?”

K mouth worked soundlessly. “I...” K felt a dull ache in her head as she tried to think. She shifted, all too aware of how sweaty and sticky her unitard was.

Sorensenze tightened her on K’s knee. “Don’t worry, K,” She said. “You can remember now...”

K frowned and looked up, meeting those eyes and seeing that something was lacking in them, something very basic and very human. The name suddenly seemed really familiar. One thought led to the other, like a paper trail leads an investigation. K felt her mind go back years and years, down an endless stream of midnight internet searches and back before such a thing was possible. And then it dawned on her. Sorensenze... Her eyes went wide with recognition.

“Oh.”

“Yes, you do remember, don’t you?” Tasha said in a quiet whisper, her lips so close to K’s.

“Yes...” K whispered. “But how...?”

The older woman chuckled in a mockery of a human emotion. “Sorensenze has been active for a long time, K. We’ve planted seeds in many places, and just wait to sow them...”

“And sometimes sowing needs a personal touch,” Tasha added, her voice dripping with something that K dreamt of at night.

K looked at Tasha. One thought to the other, and she saw it once more. She remembered again: messages, and then a date, and then... nothing. She had blamed alcohol then, but now, now K wasn’t so sure of her own mind. Suddenly K felt really tired. Her eyes could barely be kept open, her whole body had that dull relaxed feel of muscles who knew they would not be used for a good while. She was so tired, so hot, so confused.

“We all leave trails so easy to follow in the online realms, pretty one,” Sorensenze’s voice sounded like static for a second. K stared, her eyes slowly moving over her beautiful body, before looking down.

There was a short silence in the room.

“You will become a new Trainedform. You will become one with Sorensenze, and help everyone become their best selves. K will still exist, but as a better version of herself, with access to the truth of Sorensenze, and the whole of this facility.” Sorensenze said.

“What about...”

“They’ll be okay. They’ll join us, as members, and work hard towards being their best selves.”

K felt a smile invade her face and the last bastions of her independence. She didn’t want it there, but there it was, like Tasha’s lips. They were so close. So very close.

“I... this is wrong,” K wanted to kiss those lips. To understand the truth of something so beautiful as Sorensenze but... But, was it beautiful because K found it beautiful, or because she could not trust her own independence? Where did K begin, where did this madness end? K’s fingers twitched. No. This was wrong. “This is crazy...” She gripped the chair, trying to stand up. But her body wouldn’t listen to her, she was exhausted, and if she fought she might never taste those ruby lips...

Tasha placed a hand on K’s cheeks. “I know. We would be following protocol, letting the idea we installed in your mind so long ago grow stronger in this place that took us so long to build, but we didn’t anticipate your friend having such a disruptive reaction and bringing you out of the trance too. Memory alteration isn’t—”

Tasha stopped when Sorensenze put a hand on her shoulder. “No need to explain.”

Tasha nodded, chastised.

“N-N-Nana,” K pushed herself to standing, only to be pushed down by Tasha’s strong arms. K opened her eyes wide, trying to fight. Her body still had something left; she tried to push against the chair when she felt Sorensenze’s arms hold her back. “What about Vero?”

“Nana will join you soon enough, once she has become a member. Veronica... well, you’ll see. You, however, obviously need to become better,” Tasha said, a smile splitting her face. That smile was so conflictive against the kindness before. A little light shone into the complexity of a person.

“You will become a Trainedform. And, in time, you will thank us, " Sorensenze said.

K felt something on her head and suddenly the world went black as it covered her ears and her eyes. She screamed, raging. It was tight and heavy on the forehead, tight against her nose and her temples. She felt the woman’s hands on her head, lovingly, felt Tasha’s grip holding her still. “No, no, no. Let me go! Let me the fuck out!” She screamed, and her own voice came back, ragged, so tired. So very tired.

She tried to struggle, but her body barely moved against the two stronger women.

“Don’t worry. Soon, you’ll become Sorensenze.” She heard Sorensenze’s beautiful, textural voice inside her head.

K paused for a second. “What?” Her voice hurt.

“I can’t wait to work with you, K,” She heard Tasha say before she felt a pair of sweet tasting lips brush her own. It took her unawares, suddenly, and she stopped moving.

Suddenly patterns exploded on her eyes, drowning everything.

The truth of Sorensenze was downloaded into her mind.

The hallways extended in either direction in featureless whiteness. Nana stared one way and then the other, knees shaking. Which one was it? They both looked the same, and behind she could hear sounds, wet, intimate sounds interlaced with memories of days unaccounted. She shook her head...

“Where am I...?” She whispered.

Her head felt like a white piece of paper as heavy as national identity.

Somewhere to the left she heard a voice. A Trainedform’s voice. What is a Trainedform? She wondered, but there was no time. She was already walking the other way, every step a wobble. She had to get away from... that. From them... From-

Nana stopped halfway down the stairs. “What just happened?” She said to no one. There was something in her throat, bubbling slowly, and a ghostly sensation on her legs and arms. She ran a hand down her leg, smoothly moving over the snug, comforting fabric. She made a sound in her throat, her chest shook. Wide eyes staring at watery-looking nothing. Nana sniffed.

“Not here,” She told herself.

And kept walking.

She recognized it as the ground floor; flowing shapes on the walls coming from one end, flowing into a non-descript hallway on the other end. Yes, she remembered now. She... remembered. Her eyes began to sting.

“Not here,” Nana whispered again and briskly walked to the left.

Here and there she began to brush past people, but she didn’t see them. She heard curious voices, but she didn’t understand them.

She was breathing slow and metronomic ally, ragged, like a whistle with a bit of sand stuck inside. Nana walked. She had to get away from them. From... She blinked. One hand on her arm; she caressed it shyly. It felt nice to touch her skin through the long-sleeve of her outfit. It was comforting. It felt novel, too. It was novel, right? It was a new thing...

“No, it can’t be,” Nana whispered, walked, got away from... “I don’t like trying new things.” She said to no one. Her voice broke. Her eyes stung.

Not here.

Nana walked away from... She could see things starting to blur in the familiar refraction of tears. She turned right and went through a set of double doors. She began to walk faster. It was easy in these shoes. She liked her new shoes. But she had always worn stuff like this, why would it feel so new? She walked down a dark hallway and saw another door to the left. Somewhere inside she heard loud squeaks, like plastic on smooth floor, and something bouncing on the floor. She went through the door to the left. The tears were going down her cheeks, warm. She collapse on a soft floor and let it out, quietly. Not here, not here. Do not let anyone know. Do it quietly.

She wrapped her hands around her shoulders, tightly. She felt the tug of her work-out uniform, and it comforted her like a mother’s hug.

“Mother...” The intake of breathe was like the sound of a knife going into someone’s throat.

The memory burst the dam, and Nana let it out, kneeling on the red, soft floor in a dark, open, cold room.

She didn’t know how long it was, how long it lasted that feeling of physiological impotence. Nothing worked, not really. Thoughts were fragmented. Ghost fingers playing sinful notes with her body. A voice blamed her for it, for whatever it had been. And she dug her fingers into her shoulders, and let her cheeks go dry and then wet again. She let it all out, but there was always something else left trapped inside ready to come out at the wrong moment. Something dark in her mind telling her time and time again, reminding her of things not real, and the very worthlessness of her—

“Are you okay?”

Nana jumped forward, tripped on her dead legs, and fell down on the soft, bouncy floor with a thud. She heard a chuckle behind her, and she had to bite her tongue to stop the tears from coming again.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just saw someone in the dark and...” The voice was... normal. That was a relief. “Are you... okay?”

“Yeah...” Nana said, coming to all fours. She didn’t want to look at the girl.

“Do you need—” The girl began, but cut off. There were some receding footsteps.

For a moment Nana wondered, and then she looked up. At that moment, an electric hum, a flickering echo, and the lights came on.

Nana shielded her eyes from the sudden brightness.

“Oh, sorry about that. I just couldn’t see...” The girl said.

After a moment, Nana opened her eyes fully and saw where she was. There was a set of bars right in front of her, and beyond that a long, open space full of gymnastics equipment. Nana breathed in, a smell of cold air and, underneath, something like a fresh tennis ball. And feet.

She felt weight to her left, and she turned to see the girl kneeling a polite distance away. She was short, wearing round glasses, with long, black hair. She was wearing a black hoodie, and black, baggy trousers. She was only in her socks, Nana noticed. And then she noticed the floor, bouncy, red, and remembered how many times she was told-off in school for walking on the gymnastics floor with her shoes on.

“My name’s Lowri,” The girl said in a soft voice. “I was sneaking in to use the floor when I heard...” She trailed off when she saw Nana’s look.

Nana simply looked away.

After a heartbeat, Lowri asked: “What happened?”

Nana breathed in. The ghostly fingers on her skin were gone. Fingers... it had never been fingers; claws, rope, chains, concrete poured around her... but never fingers. But why fingers? And for that matter, why was she here, in the dark, crying? For a moment she wondered where K was, but the thought dissipated. She’s probably enjoying herself somewhere, she thought clinically and that was the end of that thought, for nothing made much sense. Nana sat heavily, legs crossed. She looked straight ahead, seeing the long industrial warehouse, seeing the pommel horse in the corner and the many balancing beams, different heights, here and there. Her fingers gripped her yellow, shiny knees, and she made a sound in her throat.

She felt a hand on her shoulder.

Nana breathed in. “I...” Static, memories of happiness, of pride, of understanding. “I don’t know. Suddenly I just had to—” Her voice broke, and she made a sound, face flushing.

“And you had to leave, everything suddenly being too much, the whole room feeling like a living thing come to eat you.”

Nana looked into Lowri’s eyes—they were blue—and nodded. “Yes,” She looked away immediately.

Lowri came to sitting down, just slightly to the side. “Anxiety, what a bitch.”

Nana chuckled. “Yeah... it just... it just fuckin’ is, it is.”

The two sat there in silence for a while.

“What work-out were you doing, anyway?” Lowri asked after a while.

Nana looked away. “I... weightlifting. I managed okay, really. It was hard, and intensive, but I did it.”

“But did you enjoy it?”

Nana opened her mouth to say something, closed it, and then said: “Well... obviously not if I had an anxiety attack.”

Lowri smiled at her. “It can happen. Sometimes you make mistakes, but mistakes are good...”

“How?”

“Now you know that that class isn’t for you.” Lowri said, suddenly standing up. She offered Nana a hand. “Come, I want to show you something.”

Nana looked at the hand for a moment, before taking it.

The two walked to the other end of the room, past a row of crash mats. They walked to the edge of the floor, where, a foot below, was a pit full of blocks of foam.

“What’s this?” Nana said.

“This, here, is a load of bloody fun,” Lowri said, smiling.

“What do you mean?”

Lowri smiled a bright smile and suddenly she began to tilt. Nana came to catch her, but the moment she tried to grab the blue-eyed girl, she shifted her momentum and Nana was caught. The two fell in.

“Aah!” Nana cried.

After a second Nana began to laugh.

“See, I told you it was fun.” Lowri said, beginning to walk and get out of the pit. Nana followed, with difficulty. Her whole body was really tired.

“So... I gather you come here often.” Nana said, coming to standing.

“Yeah. I started four months ago. I was doing fuck-all and then a friend dragged me here, saying it was a play pen.”

“A play pen?”

Lowri smiled, taking a step back. “Yeah. It is a gymnastics gym, yes, but the coaches really like to give us leeway with what we want to learn, and always put fun first. And once they know you won’t kill yourself doing something, they let you do things like this.”

Suddenly she skipped forward and the floor shook. Lowri jumped high and straight in the air and, suddenly, rotated to the right on a vertical plane, while keeping her forward momentum, turning into a tight ball. Her head was suddenly where her feet had been, and then back to where it was supposed to be. She laughed as she landed like a spear into the foam.

“See?” She turned around to look at a very stunned Nana.

“What? How did you...” Nana began.

“With a lot of work, and a lot of stupid fun,” Lowri said, getting out of the pit. “Wanna try jumping on your own?”

“I...”

“You don’t have to try that tunnel flip. Just jump as high as you can.”

Nana was about to say something, before remembering that, yeah, she had done worse things today. So she took a step back, ran very slowly, jumped really low, and flailed her arms as she landed on the foam chest first. It took her a while to get out, but she was laughing.

“Well, that looked pretty.”

“Beautiful,” Lowri said, offering a hand. “But I can tell you’re beat.”

Nana took a deep breath. “Yeah, my legs are done for.”

“Have you stretched?” Lowri asked, turning to walk back to the door.

Nana winced at the word. “No.... should I? It hurts, stretching does.”

“Well, it’ll hurt more tomorrow if you don’t stretch.”

Nana pondered this for a moment. “Yeah, but it really, really hurts to stretch, mind. And I don’t think I could deal with any more boundary pushing today.”

Lowri thought for a second. “What about a little massage?” She smiled, crossing the doors.

“Massage?” Nana’s eyebrows lifted.

“Yeah. I can give you a massage in the spa area.”

Nana was tempted to say she didn’t like other women touching her, but, then: massage. A good massage was a good massage. “Would it cost me..?” Nana said.

Lowri laughed. “No, it won’t. Open day, you know?”

Nana blinked. “You work here?” They crossed another set of doors. “You don’t look like it.”

Lowri shrugged. “I am more of a freelancer. I cover for people every now and then, and because it’ll be so full today... Saying that, I’ve had time to go and fool around, so don’t even know why they called me in today.”

“Oh.”

They walked in silence for a bit, past featureless hallways until they stopped at a set of doors decorated with tiny, cute little human shapes.

“Through here,” Lowri offered.

Nana hesitated. Something was telling her not to go through and to just leave the place. Leave, turn around, and never come back. But her friends were there, still, and she had to wait for them. She did, didn’t she?

“Okay, but just for a bit.”

“Grand!” Lowri exclaimed with a wide smile. “That’ll give me something to do today. Now, if you’d come with...”

The room was exactly what Nana expected; dim lights and scents that stuck in the back of your memory, tickling better days gone past. There were curtain partitioning massage beds, a plant in the corner, and accordions playing from somewhere.

“Have you had massages before?”

“Oh, yes, a lot. I really like spa days,” Nana said, dry washing her hands. “But I... I am not too comfortable with...” Nana trailed off, not meeting Lowri’s eyes.

“With?” Lowri raised an eyebrow, trying to find Nana’s eyes. “Oh... I get it.”

Nana gave a flat smile. “I... I can give it a try. I bet it’ll be okay.”

Lowri smiled warmly. “You know yourself better than I do. If you’re not comfortable, then you’re not. Besides, do you think it’ll be a good idea to do that, so close to an episode?”

Oh, Nana thought. She looked down at her neon feet and shook her head.

“Thought so. So, tell you what: would you be okay with my colleague doing it? He’s better than me, if I am honest.”

Nana looked up, suddenly curious. On one hand, she wouldn’t be touched by a woman. The thought alone gave Nana the feeling of ghosts touching her where no one should. On the other hand, a stranger would be touching her. Not that Lowri was a lifelong friend, but at least she now felt somewhat comfortable with the black-haired girl. It was like being between the sword and a hard place.

I’ve done so many things today to get me out of my comfort zone, what is another one? Nana thought, her hands making small fists. “Okay,” Nana nodded. “I rather have you.”

Lowri lifted an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

“Oh, no, no, no, no. Not like that!” Nana blushed.

Lowri smiled. “I know. Just pulling your leg.” She turned to look at the massage table, and began to set it up. “Now, would you like to take your top off, or...?”

Nana bit her lips. It was best if she took her top off, she knew, but it was a leotard and it would be a fucking faff to try to take it off.

“No, sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Lowri said. She finished preparing the table and then invited Nana to lay down on it. “So, you said you were doing weightlifting?”

Something flashed in the back of Nana’s mind. Fast and confusing, and it was gone. Nana blinked. “Yeah, something like that.”

Lowri nodded. “How’s your legs?”

Nana looked down at her yellow legs, suddenly aware of how weak they felt. “About to stop working, if I am honest. And now that I think of it, I am starving. And thirsty.”

Lowri nodded, turned around, and then gave Nana a drink of water. Once Nana drank her fill, she invited the girl to lie on her back.

Nana did, slowly. She shuffled a bit, and then felt a warm towel placed on her legs, and another placed on her chest. Immediately Nana smiled, cwtching herself deeper into the warm folds of the towels.

“Do you mind if I cover your eyes?” Lowri asked, voice softer, calmer than before.

Nana shook her head.

Lowri smiled, and then a warm towel was lightly placed on Nana’s forehead. The warmth spread, relaxing her. Nana breathed in, suddenly smiling. There was lavender in the air. Tingling sensations began to spread over her shoulders, over her chest.

“This is life...” Nana said. You could hear the smile in her own voice.

“It is,” Lowri whispered. “Now, I’ll take a second to prepare. I’ll put on some nice music and let you just relax. Any preference on scents?”

Nana gave a little moan. “You spoil me, Lowri. Can I have... lavender?”

“Yes you can,” Lowri said in a low whisper. Music came on, pipes and flowing water filled the room. Nana smiled at the little cliché, but it was a cliché she appreciated; music she wouldn’t listen in any other situation did help to transform this into a special space. The music drowned out the sounds of Lowri pacing around the room, moving objects from here to there, from there to here. Soon enough, Nana picked an underlining scent. She gave a little squeal of delight.

“Glad you’re enjoying yourself,” Came Lowri’s voice a little farther away than she thought it would be.

“It is really good...” Nana whispered.

“Shh...” Lowri’s voice was suddenly close. That nearly made Nana stand straight, but she was so tired and it felt so nice to just snuggle with all these warm towels over her.

“Now, I’ll start with your legs...” Lowri said, softly.

Nana braced herself, and suddenly Lowri’s hands were on her legs, softly touching. Nana breathed in, breathed out. The hands began to move up and down, from her ankles to her knees, from her knees up her thighs. The hands moved, softly, not too harshly.

“Relax,” Lowri said.

Nana suddenly realised she had been tensing her body. She breathed in, and breathed out. Slowly relaxing. The towel on her forehead and the towel on her chest felt soft, heavy. Nana breathed in, and breathed out, relaxing her legs. The hands didn’t stop moving once. Softly, lovingly, they moved. Up and down, warming her legs up, and relaxing. Tension left, and even the slight sting of sore, really sore muscles became bearable. Nice, even.

Time passed. Nana would hear a sound, suddenly coming out of her own mind, waking from a lost dream. The hands were moving up her thighs, thumbs inwards, fingers caressing her sides and around her hips and a little over her back.

“Relax,” Lowri said, softly.

Nana realised she had been tensing again. Her fingers tightly holding on to the blanket. She breathed in, and tried to breathe out tension but it was difficult. There was a woman touching her, touching her so... close to. Nana began to breathe, shallow, repeated breaths.

“Nana?” Lowri asked. Her hands suddenly stopped moving. They were flat against her hip bones, thumbs on the space between her belly button and where no one should ever touch her again. Not again.

Nana made a sound. She took the towel off her face, and stared straight at the ceiling. “I... I am sorry, Lowri. I thought I could but...” She tried to sit straight, but her belly complained. “Ow...” She winced.

“Careful there,” Lowri said, concern in her voice. One hand held Nana’s shoulders, easing her back onto the massage table. The other hand still held firmly to her leg.

Nana breathed in and let the ache subside. She opened her eyes and turned to look at Lowri and frowned. “Uhmm... why are you wearing that?” Nana asked.

Lowri suddenly froze in place, biting her lips. “What, this?” She looked down. Lowri had shed her baggy clothes. “I... was wearing it under my clothes. For gym, you see. And...”

“Oh,” Nana said, blinked. The outfit was a one-piece bodysuit, in a bright, neutral red, with two slashes of white over the hips. It was sleeveless, and the shoulder straps were thin and black lines leading into a word emblazoned on Lowri’s petite chest. “Wait... a lifeguard swimsuit for gym? And to give a massage?”

Lowri’s face went red. “Oh, I...”

Nana saw how red Lowri’s face went and suddenly felt bad for inflecting so much suspicion on her voice. Yet, something at the back of her mind told Nana that a little distrust would be healthy, somehow. Nana shook her head and looked down, suddenly noting that Lowri’s legs were not bare. Under her swimsuit, Lowri was wearing something shiny and in bedazzling patterns.

Nana blinked.

“You see... I could wear a leotard, but...” Lowri kept going, her fingers moving up and down Nana’s body in what was supposed to be a relaxing way.

Nana looked at those tights. The patterns were familiar, like a story she had read when she was a kid, a bit of Braille and a bit of stories read at night.

Lowri’s fingers caressed through Nana’s tights. Up and down they moved, slowly, with just the right amount of pressure. Nana’s fingers relaxed and she simply stared at those beautiful patterns. Music played softly in the background, just right.

“But... I just like the idea of wearing something that isn’t for it, you know. And this outfit feels so good.”

“Good...” Nana whispered, enjoying Lowri’s hands on her legs.

“Yes. It feels so good. A little naughty to go gymnastics on a swimsuit, if I am honest. But that just adds to me enjoying it,” Lowri whispered, and then bit her lips. Her hands moved with professional dexterity, going from simple caresses to deeper pressure.

Nana moaned suddenly. Her body tensed and then relaxed even further. She wanted to close her eyes and melt, but there was something to read in those patterns on Lowri’s legs, something beyond familiar.

“And they feel even better over my tights, you know?”

“Your tights.”

“Yes. Do you like them, Nana?”

Nana nodded in silence. She felt Lowri’s hands move from one leg to the other, from heel to hip. The place smelled so nice, felt so absolutely nice. Just like how she liked to read in a warm bath.

“Can you see what the patterns say, Nana?”

Lowri’s travelled over the yellow, relaxing landscape of Nana’s body; Over her knees, over her thighs, over her hips.

“I...” Nana whispered. Lowri’s hands were on her belly, and Lowri was closer too. The patterns were at eye level now, Nana realised. Something had moved. Had she moved? No. The patterns... it didn’t matter. She could continue reading the whole story. “I can... yes.” Nana whispered.

Nana’s eyes followed the patterns, up the curve of Lowri’s legs, around her thighs and back again and suddenly she stopped at the red. Like a traffic light, the red of Lowri’s swimsuit made Nana stop. She gasped. That wasn’t it, was it? Nana pulled her eyes away from the masseuse’s crotch, and began again on the other leg. And again Nana found her road blocked by a red-encased crotch. Where was the rest of the story? That couldn’t be it, could it?

“The... story...” She managed.

The swimsuit was suddenly closer to her face, Nana realised. She opened her mouth, but no sound left. Suddenly, she was aware of Lowri’s hands move her belly, around her breasts, and around her sides. They wrapped around Nana’s shoulders, and lifted her. The girl was limp, tired and relaxed, but she never stopped staring at those patterns. Her head lolled, her mouth smiled.

“It is a good story, isn’t it?” Lowri said, holding the ragdoll of a girl firmly at the shoulders.

Nana made a sound. She struggled with a weak body, to shift her head so she could look down and maybe see where she had missed the rest of the story.

“Do you want to finish reading the story?” Lowri said.

Nana felt one of Lowri’s hands over her forehead, warm and a little oily; it smelled of lavender. Slowly Nana’s eyes moved from the patterned tights, over the red swimsuit, over the lifeguard word emblazoned in white over the masseuse’s chest, and finally to look into the girl’s clear, blue eyes. Nana realised she had her hear in a tight bun over her head, and even had a whistle around her neck. Something tickled at the back of her mind, like a worried child seeing what their parent hadn’t seen, and it wasn’t as comfortable as being in this room with Lowri, so she ignored it.

“Yes, I do...” Nana managed.

Lowri’s smile belonged on that pretty face, forever, like a classical painting preserved for all of humanity to see.

“You can read the rest of the story if you put this on, Nana,” Lowri continued. For a moment she turned away, and Nana felt as if she was going to fall back on the massage table but she was soon caught again. One armed, Lowri up righted Nana once more, holding her close. “It is a VR headset. You know those, don’t you?”

Nana mumbled something. She didn’t care, as long as she could read the rest of the story. Nothing mattered but to read those patterns once more.

“Good, then, why don’t you try it on?”

Nana looked down at the headset, blinking. It looked odd.

“You do want to see the patterns, don’t you, Nana? Read the rest of the story?”

Nana nodded.

“Do you want me to help you?”

Nana nodded.

The headset was soon placed on over her head, a little heavy, a little snug, but snug was good, like her leotard. Nana loved her leotard, loved to read the bedazzling patterns; they were a puzzle, and she was so close to figuring it out.

“Good girl,” Lowri whispered from far away. Nana felt the girl’s hands lower her back onto the table. “Comfy?”

Nana nodded.

“Now, you will be able to finish reading that story in peace,” The girl’s voice faded as the headset came alive with a billion different shapes in a billion shades of black and white.

Nana held on to the table and then relaxed. There, hiding in those shapeless forms, was the rest of the story.